Why does my wife want to have an affair? Elaborate on the 12 hurts caused by emotional discord
When a wife cheats on her husband, the husband will also be confused and question, why does the wife choose to have an affair in a seemingly happy marriage? What exactly went wrong? The following two suggestions may serve as a reminder. "Everything happens for a reason." Only by understanding the possible causes can we take preventive measures.
First of all, men must have the courage to take responsibility in marriage and share the pressure for women. In modern society, women are no longer synonymous with "housewives". Their abilities are not weaker than men's, and their responsibilities in the workplace and at home are not necessarily lower than those of men. Therefore, if a man cannot bear his responsibilities, and the relationship between husband and wife cannot be deep enough to tolerate or ignore such a situation, the woman is very likely to seek help from the outside and commit physical and emotional cheating. Therefore, if men make themselves better and take responsibility in some aspects, they will naturally reduce the probability of women cheating.
In addition, do not do anything to hurt your wife, even if it is trivial in the eyes of your husband. When a woman who has had an affair tells her the reason, it is often because her husband treats her badly, and the most likely reason is that the husband has done something to hurt his wife. For example, he insults or even beats his wife, cheats, or the husband cheats; or the husband does not care about his wife and is indifferent. Even though the wife has already had an extramarital affair and has undergone major changes in her life routine, such as frequent phone calls and text messages, changes in her outing routine, etc., the husband still takes care of himself.
Therefore, after these little bits of damage, the wife gradually stopped taking marriage and family seriously, and found it difficult to resist the temptation of the outside world, until she chose the best without hesitation. At this time, the husband should prevent his wife from having an affair. The first thing to do is to take care of the family more and give the woman more comfort and consideration. Even if he goes out, his warmth should stay at home. In this way, the wife will naturally reduce the chance of having an affair
Emotions Revealed: 12 Hurts of Emotional Discord
1. Worsening health awareness
Marriage means responsibility, and most married people have a strong awareness of health management. Canadian scientists have found that married men seek medical advice earlier than single men when they experience chest pain. But when marriages are not going well, people often become disheartened, do not seek medical advice when they are sick, and their bodies quickly collapse. In fact, if there is a relationship problem, you might as well be generous, take the initiative to break the deadlock, put yourself in someone else's shoes, and think about how much the other person has paid for this family. And tell yourself that your body, hair, and skin are all given to you by your parents, so you can’t treat yourself badly no matter what.
2. Overeating leads to obesity
When couples have conflicts, many people will avoid stress by eating and drinking or sleeping heavily, which leads to weight gain. A survey by the Hong Kong Joint Organization for Promoting Mental Health Policy found that most women use shopping, eating, etc. to cope with marital conflicts, and bring spiritual comfort by venting outward and replenishing themselves inward. But this does not solve the problem, it will also lead to weight gain and damage your health. When you encounter emotional problems, don't always stay alone. You should talk, sing, exercise, go on outings, etc. with your friends.
3. Increase the pressure on each other
A 2009 study published in the journal Sexual Medicine confirmed that frequent affectionate interactions between couples can reduce stress and improve life satisfaction. But disagreements inevitably arise between couples, which may destroy this harmony. A British study found that household disputes and money problems are most likely to cause stress to couples. When encountering non-principled conflicts, remember that home is not a place for reason. Only by cherishing fate and being grateful can we make up for differences.
4. Big temper and bad mood
Scientists at the University of North Carolina have found that hugging can increase levels of oxytocin in the human body, a hormone that can relieve stress and improve mood. Couples who lack physical contact for a long time are prone to bad moods and bad tempers. Many couples lack spiritual and physical contact for a long time due to factors such as taking care of the elderly, children or being too busy at work, which not only affects their relationship but also harms their body. Usually holding hands or hugging shoulders, a few seconds of contact can stimulate the secretion of oxytocin and overcome anxiety.
5. Poor sleep quality
Poor sleep is often related to stress. Find out the root cause and see if it is caused by emotional problems. When you have insomnia, you can try the "Morita therapy": if you can't fall asleep, just let yourself think about it until you feel sleepy and fall asleep. Some people like to play with their mobile phones before going to bed. This not only easily causes them to suffer from insomnia, but also affects their partner's rest, making him or her feel uncared for. You should think more about the other person and get rid of bad habits that affect your relationship.
6. Suffering from anxiety
In 2010, a World Health Organization survey of 35,000 people in 15 countries showed that people in happy marriages have better mental health, while couples with tense relationships are more likely to suffer from generalized anxiety disorder. Especially people who pursue perfection will feel anxious if they find that the other person is not as good as they imagined after coming into close contact with them. At this time, you have to think about it. There is no absolutely perfect person or thing in the world. Since we choose each other, it is fate.
7. Easily suffer from depression
Strained marital relationships may increase the risk of depression. Research by Paquet, a psychiatrist at St. George's Medical School, University of London, UK, has proven that if a husband is unfaithful to his wife or the marriage breaks down, a woman's risk of depression increases six times. After marriage, many people take their lover's strengths for granted and no longer appreciate each other, which can also make people depressed. From now on, actively appreciate your partner's beauty and all that he or she does for you.
8. Start drinking alcohol
Spousal conflict or lack of intimacy can prompt people to drink. Calvin Colaruso, a professor of psychiatry at the University of San Diego, found that many men over 40 years old feel entangled and dissatisfied with their marriages, and even turn to alcohol to drown their sorrows. But drinking can't make people happy. You might as well ask the person you trust most to give you some advice on your marriage. If the problem still cannot be solved, you should seek help from a psychological counselor in time.
9. Increased blood pressure
If there is a problem in the marital relationship, it will have an impact on the blood pressure of the couple. Researchers at Brigham Young University in the United States found that people in happy marriages tend to have lower blood pressure than bachelors, while people in unhappy marriages have higher blood pressure than bachelors. American clinical psychologist Troiani explained that a poor marital relationship will cause the body to release "stress hormones" and make the heart beat faster. Maintaining an intimate relationship relies on action. Choose one day a week to do a few things for him or her to make each other feel happy and lower blood pressure.
10. Susceptible to heart disease
Many studies have shown that a happy marriage can reduce people's risk of cardiovascular disease. Research announced at the American Heart Association's 2010 Science and Technology Annual Meeting shows that within six months of the death of a spouse, the risk of heart disease increases significantly. Laughing often has a health-care effect on the heart. You can think more about the happy things in your marriage. Laughing for 5 minutes a day is very good for the heart.
11. High risk of cancer
Many studies have shown that a happy marriage can improve the survival rate of patients with prostate, lung, colon and other cancers. But if the marriage relationship is poor and both spouses are in a state of stress and worry every day, their bodies will change and they may even develop cancer. If there is a problem in a marriage, both parties should face it optimistically, take positive actions, and work together to find out the root cause of the problem.
12. Suffering from broken heart syndrome
Researchers at Columbia University found that dwelling too much on a lost relationship can cause heartache. After a year or so of psychological mourning, the widowed may wish to find a close partner and return to marriage. After the divorcee calms down, if he finds it difficult to let go of the relationship, it is recommended that he put down his arrogance and look for opportunities to remarry. But if a marriage has seriously damaged the relationship and life of both parties, don't be entangled and nostalgic anymore.