Since childhood, we have been taught that girls must have inner beauty. The so-called outer beauty can only be shown off for a while, but inner beauty can last forever. Whether it's in celebrity quotes or newspapers and magazines, it's all full of this statement. People are not cute because they are beautiful, but beautiful because they are cute. It doesn't matter whether a girl is beautiful or not. Education, connotation, and temperament are the eternal beauty. Lies repeated enough often seem to become truth. It wasn't until I reached the age when I was about to talk about marriage that I discovered all kinds of interesting rumors and rumors, and was dismissed back to the original form of lies.

When introducing a girlfriend to someone, the first thing they always ask is: "Is she pretty?" Men don't care about their status, education level, body fat or thin, age, the standards seem to be the same. I met such a man. I was in my thirties, but I had no talent or virtue. I had a date with him. He was a gentle intellectual with a stable job and a house. When he came back, he actually complained with a depressed look on his face that his appearance was too ordinary, " Not pretty at all”! God, he thought he was in a beauty pageant. He was not a handsome guy and had no education. He still had the idea that he would not marry unless he was beautiful. This was really difficult for him.

Even highly educated talents are not exempt from vulgarity. There was a doctor who returned from China and asked for marriage. He made it clear that he was looking for "cuties" and rejected talented women with high IQs. Because in the life circle he grew up in, all he came into contact with were plain-looking, highly educated women. If he was interested in them, why would he come to seek marriage? In one medical doctor class, most of the male doctors married beautiful girls from the advanced nursing class, and except for a few female doctors who had acceptable looks, many of them became a big problem.

A male doctor said frankly: We have worked hard for so many years, but if we can only marry a mediocre-looking wife in the end, what’s the point? , I really don’t know what to say, we are just ordinary people, even the talented people on the same boat cannot appreciate their own inner nature, how can the talented women who are not beautiful feel so embarrassed?

Whether you can marry or not has nothing to do with academic qualifications. The key is whether you are beautiful or not. If you tell a man who is looking for a wife all over the world that beauty of the soul is more important, he will definitely look at you like an alien and wonder if there is something wrong with your brain. Only those who have experienced the suffering of beautiful women may have some enlightenment.

I remember one time when friends got together for dinner, everyone somehow came up with the issue of the standards for marrying a wife. Several married men said that it doesn't matter whether their wife is pretty or not. Gentleness, consideration, and understanding are the most important things. What's good about beauties coveting vanity and living in heaven and earth? Immediately, a pretty female compatriot retorted disapprovingly, saying that you yourself have not married a beautiful woman, so how do you know that she must be vain? Really powerful men marry beautiful women, so-called talented men and beautiful women. A capable man can naturally seduce beautiful women and make his wife remain silent.

The men were really unhappy after hearing this. They said sourly that there was a lot of trouble in front of beautiful women. Even if they took the beauty back, they might run away with him in a few days. It was okay not to marry him, so don't worry about it. The female compatriots laughed when they heard this and said, "Don't leave Ah Q. You are really being sentimental. You haven't even seen the beauty. It's as if someone is going to come to your door to choose for you. It's ridiculous." If you can't eat the grapes, then you will say the grapes are sour. Most men who are not strong enough can only masturbate by making sarcastic remarks. In fact, everyone wants to marry a beautiful woman. The problem is that you have to weigh it first and decide whether you are worthy of her.

Some male compatriots say that the meaning of marrying a beautiful woman is not just about beauty and beauty, but a matter of appearance, and to some extent, it is a symbol of strength. When you walk around the market with a beautiful wife, even those who usually don't take you seriously will definitely look at you with admiration: Oh, I didn't expect this kid to have quite a gimmick!

Alas, are all men so shallow?

Men must be lustful

I don’t know about women, but men are undoubtedly lustful.

"Picking flowers can create love for the ice, the purity of the snow, the beauty of the willows, and the fragrance of the lotus. It can be said that no flowers can fly; meeting each other on the lake, chanting in the boat, looking for flowers and asking willows in the Xiaoxue Pavilion, it can be said that there is nothing but lust." The man is lustful. , every man has some desires of one kind or another. Especially once there are no material constraints and one has power and financial satisfaction, the lustful instinct will become more prominent and expanded. The imperial life of the highest power and wealth in ancient China was the greatest expression of this instinct. The chapter "Shang Shu Wuyi" says: "When you are born, you are free. You don't know the difficulty of marrying a wife. You don't listen to the work of a villain, but you only indulge in pleasure." It is about the life of the famous faint king King Zhou who was addicted to eroticism. It is said that King Zhou once held a large-scale banquet in the sand dunes in order to enjoy himself to the fullest. He used wine as a pool and hanging meat as a forest. Even though many naked men and women chased and played in it, he asked the musicians to make "new obscene sounds" to As for inside and outside the court, there was a loud sound of Mi Mi. There is even an idiom about wine ponds and meat forests. Although, this is an extreme and should be criticized. But King Zhou is undoubtedly a typical example of lustful men.

The likes of King Zhou of Shang are certainly not worth advocating, and the ascetic monks and Taoists may not be worth learning from. Ancient Taoist temples adopted ascetic methods for monks and Taoists, saying that sex is emptiness, and advocating a pure heart and few desires, which is really ridiculous. I don’t know how the monks and Taoists solved and released the instinctual needs of the human body while reciting Amitofu. It probably can only be accomplished by relying on one’s own comfort. Looking at the root cause, it is very likely that it is modern obscenity and Pioneer of gay masturbators. However, it is said that monks can now get married. I think it is because lust cannot be completely eradicated, it is the liberation and progress of the mind.

The elder Confucius said thousands of years ago: Food and sex are the same as sex, which means that sex is the same as eating, it is an innate need of human beings. Filling the stomach is a big issue and no one has ever objected to it. But to say that lust is human nature, many people dare not face it. In fact, the development of human beings cannot be separated from reproduction. From this point of view, lust is necessary and not a bad thing. Otherwise, we will all be ascetic monks. I am afraid that employees of the relevant departments of family planning are in danger of being laid off and unemployed. It is reminiscent of what the little nun said to Ah Q in Lu Xun's novel, which would risk "cutting off his descendants".

In fact, from a psychological perspective, going from ignorance to the pursuit of desire is the normal physiological development process of a man. It is impossible for a man not to be lustful. Otherwise, he either has a physical defect, similar to that of a eunuch; or he is a guest of a traveling doctor, which is impotence caused by kidney deficiency in traditional Chinese medicine. Men are lustful, just like cats who naturally eat mice. They will never suddenly change their taste and start whining to eat frogs or toads.

Food and drink, men and women, people have great desires. Under the man's suit and leather shoes, there is a lustful heart.

Sexual fantasy is another kind of stimulation between reality and fantasy

"Kinsey Sexology Report" goes to the extreme and tells us that men have sexual fantasies every six seconds. When their eyes glide over a sexy neck, or a hot billboard in the subway, or an ambiguous light on a tall building, or smell an inexplicable scent of perfume... they will close their eyes slightly and experience the pleasure of that moment.

One of the main ways of their sexual fantasies is "serial stories". It's like a novel, and the plot varies from person to person. The story begins with an accidental incident, in which he himself becomes the protagonist of the story, and then gradually deduces, and finally becomes a story that must be "listened to the next chapter to explain".

A sexual fantasy may not necessarily be a prelude to masturbation, but it may automatically lead to arousal and even orgasm.

Everyone has their own sexual fantasy objects, and every country has its own ranking of sexual fantasy objects: Japanese men and women love Fujiwara Norika and Kimura Takuya; in South Korea, it is Lee Young-ae and Bae Yong-joon; Americans prefer Jennifer ·Aniston and Brad Pitt couple...

As for China, we must not underestimate our imagination. The Canadian Romance Novel Publishing House interviewed about 5,500 men and women in 21 countries around the world. 95% of the Chinese interviewed admitted that they had had sexual fantasies, ranking first with the Argentinians. The Japanese are far more likely to have the least sexual fantasies (50%). The survey also said the biggest uniform temptation for Chinese men is executive suits. Another unconfirmed theory is that more men will have Zhao Wei's face flashing in their minds during sex.

Related links: Sexual fantasies, good or bad

The face of a star is by no means the entirety of sexual fantasies. Men also think about friends, colleagues, strangers, old lovers, rape, voyeurism, SM, multiple people and exchanges. All the stimulations that are difficult to obtain in real life are Can be experienced in fantasy.

Of course, the specific content of your fantasy is part of your sacred spiritual assets and does not need to be disclosed easily. But just like sex dreams, you don’t have to bring your sense of morality into the fantasy world and put unnecessary shackles on yourself. Rousseau described his own sexual fantasies in "Confessions": His sexual fantasies were often connected with masochism and masturbation. For him, fantasy is undoubtedly the green outlet for desire. Doctors often recommend using fantasy to stimulate sexual responses, relieve stress, and rebuild self-worth—you get what you need.

The danger of sexual fantasy is that there is no distinction between reality and fantasy, but for artists, especially novelists, the danger is the least, because in the creation of works of art, he has more or less found a way to return from fantasy to reality. Come here. Therefore, some people regard sexual fantasy as the special talent of an artist. “In the artist’s talent, there is naturally a skill that teaches him to sublimate and suppress. The result of suppression can, at least temporarily, turn sexual fantasy into a force that strongly produces pleasure. , the degree of pleasure can drive away and offset the pain of suppression."