Marriage means that a person must completely accept the various encounters of another person who is not related to him by blood. But in the end, what people love most is themselves. How to reconcile differences and eliminate obstacles in married life? If you want to have a good marriage, you might as well listen to the helpful reminders below!

1. Marriage is originally an empty box. What you want to take out and how much you want to take out all depend on what and how much you have deposited into it.

"Happiness" in marriage cannot only be supported by love. It can only be complete when it is connected with responsibilities, obligations, and commitments, and only then can you be guaranteed to have it firmly. If you overdraw the happiness you have never saved in the marriage box, the result will be greater unhappiness and more suffering.

2. Sometimes a good marriage is not because you get more, but because you ask for less.

The greatest respect for marriage is not to have too high or too many demands on it.

3. A good marriage is not about being changed by each other, but about adapting well to each other.

Don’t expect that one person will bring about changes in your marriage. The true nature and trump card of human nature is: no one can be reborn for any reason. Changing yourself to love someone, in many cases, seems like a heart-touching promise, but is actually a sweet promise that is difficult to implement. Marrying a person means that you have to accept him as he is in ordinary life, instead of just remembering him when he is burning with love??

4. Each other in a good marriage must be Relaxed and free, marriage is not a relationship of salvation or belonging, but a relationship.

You don’t need to spend any effort to prove what truly belongs to you. Love does not support people who are too possessive, and marriage is not a refuge for anyone. Holding on to something you are afraid of losing only shows that you are not confident. Therefore, the more you want something, the more you have to let go.

5. There is a way to achieve a good marriage once and for all.

That is: at all times, we guarantee to be our true and unique selves in a down-to-earth manner. If you want to make changes, you must also ensure that you are willing to change. Because what you want most must be obtained in its truest form to be reliable. Don't pretend to distort yourself because of love, otherwise, what you get will either not be able to keep, or it will be a costly yoke. When you feel that there is something in him that you find unacceptable, be sure to express it, no matter how contrary your opinion is to his.

6. A good marriage must ensure mutual integrity and independence.

Whether you are the CEO of a company or a waiter in a restaurant; whether your cooking is as delicious as that of a high-end chef or your popcorn is burnt in the microwave, you must firmly maintain your Uniqueness and self-confidence - for example, do you want to maintain a relatively independent space and have independent financial strength, career, family ties, friendships, and dreams?

7. A good marriage must have self-esteem.

Nothing will destroy a relationship faster than following a callous empath man begging for mercy. You have to hit hard on things you can't tolerate in a timely manner. The best way is to let him face the reality of choosing one of the two. If he ignores it, you must resolutely fulfill your promise and cannot let him think that every Not once did you just scare him. Never believe that tolerance and compromise can make him change his mind, and you can't use your dignity as a bet to beg him. Don't be afraid of conflict. The conflict between husband and wife will become an important carrier at this time to establish between you what is acceptable behavior and what is unacceptable behavior, transforming the unstable relationship between you into a healthy one. , dynamic relationship.

8. A good marriage is one where each other understands that love will evolve into a habit over time.

Just like your habit of a certain brand or scent. What is more profound in human nature than being fond of the new and hating the old is nostalgia for the past. Every moment of living together marks the couple on each other, making the two lives connected by flesh and blood. Even injuries and wear and tear are part of the mark. If he is not your prince charming, then you are not his dream girl either.

9. A good marriage makes you understand day by day that passion will always fade away.

No matter how boring you have been, how you have been strategizing, how heartbroken you are, how miserable you are, and how crazy you are - no matter how complicated it is, it will become simple; no matter how lively it is, it will become silent; no matter how exciting it is, it will will return to peace. Therefore, those who can calmly face the dullness after glory are the real winners. If love is mutual attraction and requires passion; then marriage is mutual dependence and requires deep affection. The transition from attraction to dependence is not cold, but very natural. Dependence is not coldness, but a deeper warmth, which can not only give people a sense of calm, but also evoke a feeling of relief.

10. A good marriage is one that does not record all the troubles that arise after marriage in the marriage account.

We have to understand that some troubles are inherent in life and are something we have to face as long as we live. It has nothing to do with who you marry. When people are bored, it is easy to shift problems to emotions. Even if you are not married now, how many thrilling moments will there be in your life? If a couple quarreled because they couldn't afford a house, would they be able to afford a house if they got divorced? For employees who are frustrated in the office, will their boss look down upon them if they find another job? If you want to make a change, you can only start with yourself. For example, I used to have illusions, but now I no longer have them; I used to be demanding about life and the people around me, but now I am tolerant; I used to be unable to bear the ordinary days, but now I understand that facing the trivialities and helplessness in life calmly is the real strength? < /p>

11. A good marriage is one where the couple can naturally put part of their lives together and have details and routines that they can enjoy together.

It can be a sentence, it can be a walk at the same time and place every year, or it can be a breakfast on Sunday morning? Who have you shared the joy and immersion in it with? When you are intoxicated, you will share a wealth that cannot be transferred or divided with someone, and you will also have flesh-and-blood intimacy with someone.

12. Learn to tolerate the "immovable laws" of your husband and practice making friends with them.

Perhaps only in this warm and forgiving mutual gaze can you and him really get closer. The world is beautiful because everyone is different. Just because you disagree with something doesn't mean that one of you is right and the other is wrong. Because you're looking at the world through two completely different lenses, he doesn't really mean to drive you crazy, it's just the way he does it. Realizing this will set each other free in a marriage.

13. Don’t say things like “monogamy is not in line with human nature”.

We must know that human nature is complex. It is human nature to like freedom, and it is human nature to be afraid of loneliness. It is human nature to rebel against tradition and challenge society, and it is also human nature to comply with rules and maintain harmony. It is difficult for us to understand how contradictory human natures interact and distinguish which ones are better in the complex information system composed of the human body's nerves, body fluids, and endocrine systems. As long as you are human, you cannot be 100% consistent with another person. And more importantly, as long as you are human, you will have the need to be intimate with others - it is better to simply bear the helplessness and hardship and support each other for life.

14. You have to let him work at home, don’t spoil him.

There is one of the most basic laws in economics called "diminishing marginal returns", which refers to the degree of satisfaction that an additional unit of supply of something that can produce the same effect will produce to the same recipient. The less. The relationship between two people in marriage is always just an interpersonal relationship. Like all interpersonal relationships, it requires skill and balance. In a marriage, any matter that one person contracts will result in one party not caring about the services provided by the other party as much as breathing air. Because of the long-term "model", your services have devalued invisibly! And being a "model" by "persisting" and "bearing" for a long time will make you expect the other person's gratitude, and if you don't get it, you will gradually become resentful. Marriage is a bit like making dumplings. Even if you can roll out the wrappers and wrap them, it's best to roll out the wrappers and wrap them one at a time.

15. Treat and respect your husband’s ego with caution.

Men usually have a strong sense of self. You have to make him feel that he is a man and "mistakenly" think that he is in power. Only then can you possibly deal with him. In fact, women's tears are sometimes like daggers wrapped in water, capable of conquering invulnerable men. Men sometimes like to give themselves as a gift to those who need him most. The more powerful a man is, the more he hopes to be needed to the maximum extent. The easiest things to win men are those who can arouse their care and love. woman.

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16. Do your best to make your marriage full of flexibility and tension.

A good wife is a woman who is reserved, generous, calm and calm - she looks weak, but in fact she is highly flexible; she looks passive and tired, but she has strong control in her bones; she looks easy-going and decent, but she is actually very flexible. But he never gives up his principles easily. Only women with this kind of character tension and spiritual flexibility can manage a good marriage. She can maintain her balance in two completely opposite ways - neither giving people an aggressive sense of oppression, but also using strong means to make the marriage open at any time, but always in constant tension.

17. Don’t easily regard other women as rivals, and don’t force yourself to compete with another woman for the limelight.

When you compare yourself to another woman, you are already putting yourself down. Many times, a woman's intimidation to another woman depends on how you position her. You know, it is difficult for a truly powerful man to be tempted. The more men you have met with countless people, the more you know how to identify and eliminate women. Their emotional ignition point is very high and they are not easily ignited. Emotionally, stalking is of no use, so it is better to remain calm.

18. Don’t be too keen on playing “full court man-to-man” games.

Don’t ask him where he went today or what he did with whom. Forcing a man to defend himself all day long, or to report his whereabouts to you at any time, is equivalent to sending him back to the middle school classroom or to his mother. Even if he has a "criminal record", holding on to him will only make him feel bored. What you have to do is not to deprive him of his right to freely choose to buy goods, but to find a way to convince him that the transaction itself is in his vital interests.

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