Marriage has the "seven-year itch". People who have experienced love know that the "itch" is likely to appear after a year. During the 365 days, the relationship quietly changed. As the familiarity with each other increased, the initial passion faded and people began to become rational. I often hear wives or husbands complain like this: "We are getting closer physically, but the distance in our hearts is getting farther and farther..."

The sweet words that slipped away

Wife's point of view: Since getting married , he rarely speaks sweet words to me. Even if he wants to make me happy, he is too lazy to do it. Now it's harder than ever to hear him say "I love you".

Husband’s point of view: We are all a family. I love her and she loves me. We both know this in our hearts. Why bother saying it again?

Couples in love seem to have endless whispers to say, and the vows made one after another are touching. After getting married, those sweet words seemed to have been finished, replaced by some routine politeness like "You are back", or straightforward like "I bought a bag of rice after get off work."

Life after marriage is indeed a lot more realistic, but to maintain a sense of freshness in ordinary life, the only way is to continue the heat and enthusiasm in love, so that both husband and wife can feel that they are in the trivial daily life. happiness. Otherwise, marriage will really become the grave of love.

Learn to have pillow talk

Society is highly competitive and everyone is under a lot of pressure. After returning home, I just wanted to rest and was too lazy to talk to my lover around me. But you can allow yourself to chat with your lover before falling asleep. It doesn't have to be an earth-shattering vow, it can be the small things that happened around you today, the interesting things you saw and heard, which contain care and consideration, which will definitely move the other person more than sweet words. And the bed is a great place to solve a lot of problems.

Awakening beautiful memories

Take out the yellowed love letters, the doll you gave you for the first time, the video of each other holding hands, and the photos taken from traveling around. These are all the things you once loved when you were in love. memories. When life becomes dull, we must let these past continue to play a role. Let's look back at the days we have passed together. The sweetness and hard work will definitely make each other strengthen our belief in love and cherish everything we have now.

Continue to express your love

Feedback to your spouse’s loving actions and express your true inner feelings. For example, if the wife forgets to rest after get off work and cooks a large table of dishes, the husband should give his wife a compliment: "My dear, I love your food the most. If you do this again, you will make me fat!" , hearing such words, the wife’s fatigue must be swept away.

Communication is the most important means in marriage, and the basic element of communication is language. Saying a gentle and considerate word can make the other person "feel happy"; saying a sincere comfort can make the other person feel free of all grievances; saying a joking word can immediately enliven the tense atmosphere. You might as well try the magical charm of language together.

Family life taken away by career

Wife’s point of view: He spends far more time in the company than at home, and he always has endless projects to finish. Report, I have to go out to entertain clients on weekends. He still doesn't know whether he wants this home or not.

Husband’s point of view: I don’t work so hard just to make her eat well. Not only did she not understand me, she also wanted to get angry with me.

Whether it is before or after marriage, we all hope that our lover can accompany us as much as possible. This is human nature. But love is not the only thing in life, it is not "bread". Any marriage needs a material foundation, and the way to obtain money is to work. What should we do when our spouse is particularly focused on work?

Understanding and Support

Having ideals, careers, and pursuits is a good thing. We should be proud of having such a lover. Just because your spouse is focusing on his/her career does not mean that he/she does not love you. He/she is fighting for a better family life, and the other spouse should show understanding and support to the greatest extent possible. When he/she has difficulties, guide him/her carefully; when he/she succeeds, share the joy.

Entering a marriage "covenant"

It is also not advisable to forget family responsibilities for the sake of career. Husband and wife can reach a "covenant" to clarify each other's responsibilities to the family, such as one party taking on more housework, doing some things together, etc. Agree on a family development plan and then work together. The methods of hard work can be different. The husband may work more hard outside, while the wife may use more "logistical support". vice versa.

Don’t forget your role as “husband” or “wife”

In the company, you are the director and the boss, but at home, you are the “husband” or “wife” ", to fulfill the responsibilities of "husband" or "wife". Going out with your family for outings, sharing housework with him/her, and preparing surprises for him/her are all practices that do not conflict with work but can enhance your relationship.

There is a story about former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher: One day, Mrs. Thatcher came home and knocked on the door to ask her husband to open the door. The husband asked, "Who is knocking on the door?" Mrs. Thatcher replied without thinking, "The Prime Minister of the United Kingdom." But after waiting for a long time, her husband did not come to open the door, so she knocked again. The husband asked, "Who is knocking on the door?" This time Mrs. Thatcher replied, "Your wife." Within a few seconds, the husband opened the door with a smile.

Friendship and marriage, which one is more important

Wife's point of view: After getting married, he still likes to hang out with those "hustlers", either drinking or playing pool. Is being with me so boring?

Husband’s point of view: Getting married doesn’t mean I have to break up with my friends. We already eat and sleep together. Can’t I still spend some time with my friends? Human life is very colorful. Although marriage is an important part of life, people still form relationships with other people in society besides their spouse. This is especially true for young people.

Get to know his/her friends

Having a group of mutual friends can go a long way in maintaining family relationships. Do you know his/her friends? Do you know what they usually do together? If you are worried about the other person but still want to be with the other person, why not integrate into his/her circle of friends and become friends with more people. Just because he/she is good with friends does not mean that friends are more important than lovers. There must be something in common between him/her and the friend, otherwise they would not be friends.

Keep a moderate distance

Couples should each retain a free space in their hearts. No one should try to transform the other, but should try to adapt to the other and allow the other to have independence. Personality, unique personality and a moderately free life circle. "A little separation is better than a new marriage", this is the truth.

Don’t lose friends

No one can lack friends. Some deep friendships are even longer-lasting and more sincere than love. Many newly married young people are deeply attached to their newly formed families, especially girls, and ignore sisters with whom they have known each other for several years. In fact, friends can not only help and support us in all aspects, but also expand our life circle, enrich our horizons, and increase our experience. After all, a family of two people is a relatively small space. If we are only "imprisoned" in this small space, our lives and thoughts will become smaller and smaller. Such a life is boring and boring, and lovers will gradually get tired of it. Therefore, after marriage, relationships outside of marriage cannot be excluded. You must maintain your own hobbies, your own circle of friends, and maintain those equally hard-won emotions. Only in this way can you achieve continuous improvement and development, which is beneficial to family life without any harm.

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Completely different interests and hobbies

Wife’s point of view: He especially likes hiking, while I like to stay at home and read books. Every time I see him hanging out happily with his "alley friends", I feel very disappointed.

Husband’s perspective: I’ve always wanted her to travel with me, but she always said no. But I can't do it if I stay at home and read with her.

Many interests and hobbies existed before marriage, but they will be restricted due to marriage. Different living environments, different educations, different life circles, and different personalities make everyone have completely different interests and hobbies.

Don’t try to change each other’s hobbies

Although the same hobbies will make the relationship stronger, this is not the only criterion for a happy marriage. The foundation of a happy marriage is sincere affection for each other. In fact, in real life it is difficult to find a couple with exactly the same interests and hobbies. Don't try to change the other person's hobbies or impose your own hobbies on the other person. Doing so will only be counterproductive. First, respect and adapt, and then balance the interests and hobbies of both parties.

Learn from each other

Understand why this has become your spouse’s hobby, and what kind of happiness and knowledge your spouse has gained from this hobby. Let your lover share with you the happiness and knowledge he/she has gained, and share your own gains with him/her. In this way, he can make up for his lack of experience and knowledge, enrich his life, and fully express his respect and support to the other party.

Try to be satisfied

My husband occasionally goes out to play basketball or play poker with a group of boys on weekends, so that they can gain this feeling of independence. Some husbands like to fish alone and stay quietly for a while in their free time; some like to study car models; some like to visit antique markets. No matter how your husband arranges these happy free time, as long as he does not turn a hobby into a bad habit, and if your wife can satisfy him as much as possible, then this wife will be the wisest wife.

As time goes by, love relationships are constantly changing and updating. In the early stages of love, you can feel the frantic heartbeat all the time. We are eager to know more about each other and discover new characteristics of each other. Then, after love has experienced its peak state, everything becomes dull, the novelty of love gradually fades, and the relationship between lovers begins to become rational. We should treat this emotional change correctly and give each other more understanding, support and free space. These changes are inevitable, and they may make you unable to adapt or even panic. But from another perspective, change makes life get rid of the sameness and makes the boredom of both parties disappear. Even the most perfect love will encounter difficulties. When encountering difficulties, as long as both parties treat it with a positive attitude and the correct method, the problem will definitely be solved.

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