What value does a woman have in the eyes of men?

French historian Michelet said: "Woman is a relative person." What he means is that women cannot define themselves, and women must define themselves through men.

So, what is a woman to a man? The two most representative answers can be given by the stories of Mrs. Li and Mrs. Gou Yi.

A peerless beauty who captivates the country is what men dream of. However, as Mrs. Li said, what men like Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty love is not her as a person, but her "color". "When lust fades, love is strong; when love is strong, kindness is cut off."

If a man is a typical traditional Chinese man, then he will inevitably incorporate the ancient saying "There are three types of unfilial piety, and the greatest is having no offspring" into his bones, and Mrs. Gou Yi is not only so beautiful that she is as beautiful as a fish and a wild goose. She would be an even more perfect woman to give birth to a son to Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty, who was over 60 years old, and to help him complete the task of carrying on the family line.

However, Mrs. Gou Yi, like Mrs. Li, had no value of her own to Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty. The most lustful Mrs. Li was the favored sexual object of Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty, while Mrs. Gou Yi was the tool for Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty to carry on the family line. They were only not themselves.

Swiss psychologist Jung said that deeper than the Freudian subconscious is the collective unconscious. Each culture has its own collective unconscious, and there are many archetypes hidden in this collective unconscious. A typical person can be regarded as a representation of the prototype in the collective unconscious of this culture.

From this, we can say that Mrs. Li and Mrs. Gou Yi are the female prototypes in our culture. If we understand their stories, we will also understand a lot of women's psychology. Or, conversely, when you find it difficult to understand the psychology of modern women, you might as well think about the stories of famous women in history such as Mrs. Li and Mrs. Gou Yi. Maybe you can find some answers there.

If I just go through my consulting experience, I can say that women are people who want to catch a man but cannot, and feel pain as a result. The reason why I say this is because adult female clients basically come to me for marriage and love problems at first, and nearly 80% of them have similar pain - the man they care about most doesn't care about them.

Some people often say that women are emotional animals, so once they find that love does not seem to exist, they will fall into great pain.

But I can say with certainty that men are also animals of love. Once they discover that love does not exist, a man’s entire sense of existence will be shaken. Although there are some exceptions for men, such as the French philosopher Thomas Benoza had no need for women. He always hid in a place alone and thought about ethics. But generally speaking, the vast majority of men are also love animals.

The problem is that men and women have different understandings of love. It seems that it can be summarized that women’s understanding of love causes men’s pain, and when men want to escape from this pain, they will be understood by women as They don't love themselves, and they fall into more pain.