People say that marriage has a "seven-year itch". Later, they said that it will get "itchy" in three years. Nowadays, young people say that it won't take that long, and it will be "itchy" in one year. What's the reason? Dear Mr. Fei in "Mobile Phone" has a famous saying: "Aesthetic fatigue"...

Scratching yourself

Seven-year itch? What era is this? It’s so outdated. The three-year itch happened in the last century, right? A year's itch won't do, it's all out of date. Why don't you "advance with the times" at all?

What is marriage? Marriage happens because a woman is confused and uses a notebook to trap people in a house. Think about it, being trapped in a house and playing for a while is okay, but if it takes a long time, who can bear it? Love and family are all artificial terms. Is there still love now? I mean pure love, selfless love that comes from the heart without any strings attached. A famous critic once solemnly stated his findings at a national academic conference: There is no love in China. Why not? Because love has been piled up by people with responsibilities and rights to form a crushing mountain. If I love you and marry you, you have to bear children for me, do housework, and serve the elderly. If I love you and marry you, you will be responsible for me, earn money for me to buy a house and make me happy. what's up? Are you naive? Want to tire yourself out? Isn’t this world tired enough? If you love the other person, why should you make the other person tired? Why can't you make the other person relaxed? Don't do to others what you don't want others to do to you. If you love the other person, you should carefully observe whether the other person is "itchy". Of course, you can scratch it as you please. If it's aesthetic fatigue, it's easy to deal with it. Make yourself beautiful again, scratch the other person's itch, and turn fatigue into excitement or freshness. If not, then scratch if you want to, make the other person feel pain, make the other person sore, and make the other person love you again. If you don't want to scratch, just turn around and walk away. You don't even know who will solve your itch!

Why do punk (friend love) families appear? Why should one party in a marriage be treated as a friend? To a large extent, it is because of "itch". There is no need to make both parties suffer to death for a red book. What's the point of such a marriage? Why do "flash marriages" happen? Marriage is as fast as lightning. Brothers think that friends who dare to have flash marriages are smart. That is called simplifying complex problems. People are advanced and complex animals. There are few examples of people who get married and never understand their partner for the rest of their lives. ? Why not simplify complicated things, get married when you fall in love at first sight, break up if you don't like it, and break up when there is no love anymore? This is in line with human nature. Why suppress yourself, why go against your heart. How about advocating people-centeredness? Those marriages for the sake of having children are such a pale life!

Stop talking about it, getting married is not fun, getting married is really boring.

Don't let "itch" turn into "pain"

The seniors who walked into the siege shouted about aesthetic fatigue and advocated "weekend couples". People outside the city were afraid of marriage and respected single nobles. It’s no wonder that several colleagues and friends around me never mentioned marriage when they saw this older young man getting married. They even summed up a classic saying: “Marriage is the tomb of love”, which meant that they were in love with marriage.

When you have a vigorous love, go through a romantic wedding ceremony, and enter the world of firewood, rice, oil and salt, love begins to be tested by washing, cooking and raising children, and begins to be tempered by the symphony of pots and pans. For decades, we have been facing the same face every day, and all we have seen and heard are trivial things about the east's family and the west's family. Even if we don't suffer from aesthetic fatigue, we will never get tired of looking at each other like we did when we were passionately in love. At this time, the feasting and feasting outside the city and the colorful beautiful scenery are always enviable, making restless hearts eager to move and long for endlessly. Marriage carries more of family affection and responsibility. If this is the "itch" in marriage, then it is the way to go.

Although marriages all have itches and they all have to go through this hurdle, the results vary greatly depending on how individuals deal with it. When a marriage has symptoms of itching, it is like a person suffering from a minor illness. You can't ignore it, and you can't give up easily. Use communication, understanding, consideration, tolerance and careful treatment. It is best for both of you to put some thought into it, have more innovative ideas and awareness, and work hard to create new romance and passion. Let the itch of marriage slowly subside, and finally reach the ideal state of "the most romantic thing I can think of is to grow old with you". If not handled properly, a minor illness can turn into a major illness, and a minor itch can turn into major pain. For example, extramarital affairs, such as divorce, will always leave deep shadows and wounds that are difficult to heal.

In fact, whether it is family ties or responsibilities, after all, they are lovers who have known each other for many years and have become part of each other's lives without knowing it. Even if the left hand touches the right hand and there is no feeling, it is really necessary to lose the other person. What if It's as painful as cutting off one's left and right arms. Marriage requires management. Only when both husband and wife put in sincerity and hard work can they reap happiness. Everyone who is entering into marriage, remember to cherish it and don't let the itch of marriage turn into pain.

Facing the "itch" of marriage

Pitch, physiologically speaking, is a type of pain and a normal physiological phenomenon. Just think, who hasn’t been itchy? Not to mention itchiness, it’s just some ailments. Who can guarantee that they will never suffer from it for the rest of their lives? If you have itching or pain, seek medical attention as soon as possible and you will recover soon.

The same is true for marriage. When a couple lives together for a long time, it is inevitable that they will have itches and pains. This is a normal thing, and there is no need to talk about "itches" and discoloration. After marriage, the passion and freshness of the love period have been worn away by the daily necessities of life, and the romantic mood has been completely depleted by the children's endless crying and naughty tossing. The marriage has become dull and trivial. At this time, There began to be quarrels and alienation between husband and wife, and "itching" occurred.

Physiological itching can be relieved by scratching it with your hands, but the scratching must be moderate, and you must not scratch it until it is bloody for the sake of temporary pleasure. In this way, once the itch is relieved, the pain will also disappear. Come. The scratched area will become inflamed, pus, and scabbed, and even if it heals, it will leave scars. In the same way, if you feel itchy in your marriage, you should be cautious. Just because of a chance encounter, a gentle word of concern, or a knowing look, you can't let yourself lose control and do something to tear your marriage apart. When the time comes, your wife and children will be separated, and you will still regret it. What's more, if you jump from one marriage to another, as time goes by, you will definitely enter a new round of itch. Jumping around, how many seven years can your life last? When I was tired, tired, and could no longer dance, I realized how precious I had thrown away.

Itch is a wake-up call for marriage. It reminds us to examine our marriage. Is it aesthetic fatigue, or has it really come to an end? If two people really don't love each other anymore, divorce is not a terrible thing. It is a wise choice to free each other from the shackles. Everyone must still remember the classic line from Feng Xiaogang's "A Sigh": "When I touch your hand, it's like touching my own hand. I don't feel it. But if I want to saw your hand off, it's the same as sawing it off." My hand still hurts. "The fact that I can still feel the left hand touching my right hand means that our love has not reached the end yet, and it has not reached the point where we are incompatible with each other. At this time, why don't we sit down and think about how to manage it? Where is our love?

Sickness is a minor disease, but we must learn to create with tolerance and care with our hearts. I believe that our marriage will be healthy and beautiful, and we will definitely fulfill the beautiful vow of "holding my son's hand and growing old with him". !

The smell of mid-term perfume

Although the smell of perfume that has been left for a period of time is not as strong as that of freshly opened perfume, it is most refreshing and calm, allowing people to control themselves more easily, and people will not be overly intoxicated by the fragrance. This is a Take your time and enjoy the process. The same is true for marriage. After a couple has lived together for more than five years, the intense joy of newlyweds has faded away, and it is more about family love. This is like the smell of perfume in the middle period. You may not know it after sitting for a long time. The fragrance is in the room, but you are truly surrounded by the light fragrance that lasts.

Psychologist Di Xiaolan believes that when the relationship between husband and wife is dull, they need to persevere and eventually transition from unstable love to eternal family affection. If you think about it carefully, it makes sense. Marriage is flexible. It contains the ups and downs of life, as well as all kinds of unspeakable tastes. It is normal to have the so-called "itch", just as natural as the weather is hot and cold and the seasons change. Don't look at the dull relationship between some couples. Once an unexpected accident occurs in the family, their common sense of responsibility for the family requires them to work together. It is often at this time that they feel the inextricable and inseparable affection between each other. People often say that the true love between husband and wife in times of adversity can best be seen at this time, and this is also the true integration of husband and wife. When you are bedridden, tortured by illness and moaning endlessly, your lover will take care of you day and night, and can you rely on that person who once made you aesthetically pleasing? From this point of view, the so-called "aesthetic fatigue" and the "seven-year itch" seem so insignificant in front of the love shown by the couple when they share hardships.

The man named Fei in "Mobile Phone" is a frivolous and irresponsible old man. The words "aesthetic fatigue" come from such a man's mouth. You must not take it to heart. Just A man who laughs when he sees new people but doesn't cry when he hears old people is not worth mentioning. Marriage is closely related to responsibility. As long as you have the courage to take responsibility, there will be no bottleneck in your marriage that cannot be broken. As you grow older with him (her), even if you are "itchy" occasionally, you will see it as a scenery of the life between the two of you. Those couples who never leave each other, appreciate each other's love, immerse themselves in it quietly, and calmly smell the smell of the perfume in the middle period.

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