Japan's private detective agency provides a service, which is "finding first love", and 90% of its customers are women. It can be seen that women care about their old lovers far more than men do. Why do women miss their old lovers? Why would you want to call them?

One reason: I thought of him by chance, and his phone number was easily found.

29-year-old An Lin returned to her hometown town for official duties. Passing by the gate of her alma mater middle school, those familiar sights and smells reminded her of her middle school days and first boyfriend. The innocent love affair of the past aroused her infinite emotion. Out of nostalgia for the good past and curiosity to know whether her former lover was safe, she got the boy's phone number from her mother and dialed him. phone number. They had dinner together and recalled the good memories together.

Benefits: Satisfies his curiosity and vanity, because he still remembers the past events many years ago.

Disadvantages: This kind of reunion is enough once, don't abuse it. Otherwise, even the good memories will be hard to keep. In fact, everyone knows in their hearts: everything in the past will never come back.

Reason two: Because he once said that you can dial his mobile phone number at any time if you want.

36-year-old Xiaowei recalled: I initiated the breakup with him, and he was very sad. The last time we met, he burst into tears. It was very heartbreaking for a grown man to cry like this. He said that I was a pain in his heart forever. But he understood my determination, because he really couldn't give me the happiness I expected. He said that I could dial his mobile number anytime, anywhere if I wanted to. Every Christmas after that, I would call him, feeling guilty that I had hurt a heart that loved me so much.

Benefits: In men's tears, women's vanity is satisfied. Comforting a broken heart is something all women want to do.

The Bad: Men are much more forgetful and vindictive than we give them credit for. When the pain in his heart subsides, your image and status in his mind will completely change. When you are still calling him with an apologetic and caring tone, he may be muttering in his heart: This woman is annoying enough, and she always doesn't know the correct position she is in.

Reason three: A woman calls her old lover to invite him to her birthday party.

Excuse. A woman hopes to see her old lover again, but dating alone will make her feel awkward, and she doesn’t know whether the other person is willing to accept such a date, so she is willing to use gatherings on some important anniversaries as an excuse to let her old lover appear with everyone. 32-year-old Mary invited her old lover to attend on her birthday. But among her group of relatives and friends, his appearance seemed very sudden. He didn't know who to talk to, so he stood alone in the corner. A very awkward reunion.

Benefits: Satisfies women's vanity. He is still willing to accept our invitation.

The Bad: Apparently he's starting to regret coming to this party. He won't accept your invitation so easily next time.

Reason four: Breaking up is helpless.

Why do we still have to separate in the end even though we are obviously in love? This relationship is an eternal pain in the woman's heart. She believes that he is the most suitable person for her in the world. Now that the objective environment has changed, can we start over?

27-year-old Charlene recalled: The days with him were the happiest times in my life. After him, I had never met another man who could make me so happy. I called him but he never answered.

Advantages: Women can think that he refuses to answer our calls because he is still grieving for the lost love, and he does not have the courage to face us again and lose us again.

Thinking like this can satisfy a woman's vanity.

The Bad: Life is cruel. Our wishes often go unfulfilled. He ruthlessly declined our requests to meet.

Reason five: Women are willing to call their old lover because they feel that he is the only person who can talk to them about their troubles.

Effie, 22, said: Every time I feel depressed, I call my ex-boyfriend and tell him about my troubles. He is more than a friend, in my heart, he is a forever lover.

Benefits: Satisfies self-vanity. This man still has the patience to listen to us. Does he still love me?

Disadvantages: It’s best not to make this kind of talk a habit. You must know that he should have a new love life. If he always receives your confession calls in the middle of the night, what will his current girlfriend think? Be realistic and don't always indulge in fantasy. We are already his past.

Reason six: A woman calls her old lover because she still loves him.

36-year-old Shu Ya said: He left me and I was very sad. A year later, I still couldn't forget him, so I called him. He came and spent a night with me, but I found that everything had changed irrevocably. I could no longer face him with the same mentality, because his departure caused me too much harm. It's impossible to forget all this. This reunion will be our last meeting.

Bonus: Great, the woman didn't cry when he left this time. We can finally be freed from the shadow of this failed love.

Disadvantages: Women once again realize that a man can change his love for us without our permission, and there will be no punishment for his betrayal. Life is cruel.

Reason 7: Sometimes time needs a little turn back.

Women always need to prove that love can last forever.

35-year-old Yueming has been dating her old lover regularly for 10 years since she was married: "I can call him at any time, and he will try his best to come see me, and we will reminisce about the past together."

Benefits: Satisfies women's vanity. It is not a woman's fault to create a warm environment for herself at any time.

Disadvantages: Basically no disadvantages. But if your husband knew, what would he think of you?

Reason 8: Single life can be unbearable at times.

Li Sha, 31, said: "After leaving him, I have been living alone. One night, I was extremely lonely, so I asked him to have dinner with me. But the moment he appeared at the door of the restaurant, I understood again why. We can't be together, I don't love him anymore."

Benefits: Women understand that single life is most appropriate when there is no love.

Cons: Spending some lonely and uncomfortable nights alone.

In fact, the biggest difficulty in getting along with an old lover is how to understand the failed relationship between the two and how to correctly view the current relationship between the two.

Is it love? Or friendship?

Being too hung up on the past can psychologically and even physically destroy your present life. Most men do not believe that friendship between the sexes exists. They come to see you either out of unquenched love, curiosity, or unwillingness to reject your kindness. After women know this, they may be more cautious when making this call.

The reason why memories are beautiful is because they have passed and can no longer hurt us. Let them become what they are now, and they will become a sharp sword again.