In the popular "Love in a Fallen City", Fan Liuyuan said to Bai Liusu, "For you, marriage is long-term prostitution." However, Bai Liusu didn't care so much because he "captured" Fan. Yanagihara was her long-term meal ticket, and she felt like she had won the battle. At that time, women had to be raised by men, and men farmed and women weavered, so the so-called marriage was probably just an illusion of happiness.

What now? Women play a powerful role in the workplace. They are financially independent and think differently. It has become the choice of some couples for a woman to take care of the outside and a man to take care of the house. There are more and more cases of women raising boys, and a "new era of raising boys" is slowly emerging. Is such an anti-traditional relationship between men and women subversive or retrogressive? Freedom or adventure? As long as they are raised neither humble nor arrogant and have peace of mind, then Huang Gai will be beaten - one is willing to be beaten and the other is willing to suffer.

An alternative sample of "apron man" and "executive woman": "raising" you is to make you happy

"Husband, I'm back!" At seven o'clock in the evening, home Yuluo's voice came from the door, and her husband Abin was cooking his best three-cup chicken in the kitchen. After putting on her pajamas, Yoluo immediately went to the kitchen to help her husband, "My dear, I made so many delicious dishes today!" "Of course, you have been working overtime these days, so I can give you more nutritious food." ”

The 30-year-old Youluo has been married for several years. At that time, Abin was a civil servant in the bureau and received public food from the state, while Youluo was just an ordinary employee in the company. In just a few years, the diligent Youluo was appreciated by his leadership and promoted to a company executive, making his life more comfortable. But there was always something bothering her. Her husband's high-sounding job was not an idle job. The boss's face and the intrigues in the officialdom made Abin, who was originally not good at this kind of thing, look old at a young age. She looked at her husband. With a sad face, Yoro felt unhappy. She said to A Bin, "Just quit your job. We don't need the thousands of dollars, and we don't want the face. Just do whatever you like, and I support you!"

A big man It doesn't sound good to say that a man lets a woman take care of him. Abin hesitated for a while, but Yoro said, Husband, it's the 21st century, can you stop being so pedantic? Which of us will follow whom?

Indeed, Yoluo is a career-oriented woman and Abin is a life-oriented man. Standing in the right position is the most beneficial to the entire family. After resigning, Abin became full of freshness about life. Photographing, reading, creating... The ideal of simple and casual slow life that he had been pursuing for many years finally came true. And with her husband's encouragement, Yoluo's career is flourishing. There is no need to worry about finances. Yoluo's salary alone is enough for two people. It is said that the wife "supports" the husband, but in fact, the husband is not a free earner. Climbing grids is one of Abin's hobbies. In the past, his articles were often seen on major newsstands in provincial capitals. Now that he has resigned, he has more time to engage in writing. The fees are paid piece by piece, and he can go there again on a regular basis. It’s no problem to support yourself by helping out in a friend’s bookstore. His cooking skills are also very good, and now he cooks at home whenever he has free time. Youluo enjoys the meal by himself, and even invites a few friends to join him to support him, which gives Abin a great sense of accomplishment. Although some people jokingly called Abin the "apron man", the happy couple did not take it seriously.

Yoluo said that if my husband can help me stabilize the "rear area", that is the greatest support for me. I believe that if we changed places, and it was me who was worried about work and my husband who was high-spirited, he would definitely agree without hesitation that I give up the job that makes me unhappy and take on the responsibilities of the family. Because we love each other deeply. What does it matter if a woman raises a man? As long as I have the ability and he has the need.

Abin’s next goal is to own a photography studio of his own. He said, wife, if you are tired by then, I will take care of you!

Happiness has nothing to do with who supports whom

In fact, those who insist on clearly distinguishing who "raises" whom are just "poor people" in marriage, who only know about food and clothing and lack of pursuits. Performance. Real life requires both parties to have common values ​​and work together.

Raise him and achieve him

Xiaomi works an ordinary job in the company with a monthly salary of 3,000, but this money is the source of all expenses for her and her husband. My husband is too lazy to go out and do things? unemployed? neither. It turns out that Xiaomi's husband has always wanted to go to school to further his studies since he started working. Last year, he finally got his wish and was admitted to a graduate school in a prestigious university. Studying fully off-the-job means that one person earns money and two people spend it, and life is inevitably a bit more tense than before. Fortunately, my thrifty husband never wastes MONRY and even does part-time jobs from time to time to support his family. Xiaomi said, I don’t feel disadvantaged in supporting my husband, and he doesn’t feel ashamed. I have supported him in the past few years. If he becomes a shining good man in a few years, I will make a profit!

Han Han said that being pregnant is like being pregnant, and you can only see it after a long time. Today's women are not stupid, they will take action when they see potential stocks. Men who can impress women do not use good looks as an "equivalent exchange", but use talents and talents to make women selfless. It's just that the risk will also increase, and it basically belongs to stock market investment.

Men are not your pets and dolls

A girl asked me, what if I don’t raise my husband well and spoil him rotten? It’s better to keep a pet than a man, at least it won’t betray me. I say, whether you turn a loss into a profit or lose everything depends not only on your ability to control, but the most important thing is what kind of man you raise. It’s okay to raise it, but you can’t indulge it. Those examples of "bad" cultivation should be taken as a warning.

Failure Case: Raising a Man to be Li Jia

Hui Hui’s husband is unemployed, so he often uses Li An to encourage his wife: When I find a job, if you don’t want to work, I will support you for the rest of your life. Huihui thought so, so she turned in all her bankbooks, worked overtime, and did housework as soon as she got home. When she couldn't stand it anymore, she and her husband went out to eat. All the friends who have suffered losses are filled with indignation, why doesn’t your husband cook when he is free? "Because he has a heavy study load, he has to take the lawyer's license exam, and he is studying for an online distance MBA. I feel sorry for him!" Two years later, my husband found a good job, and on his first day at work, he sent an email saying You want a divorce, why? After careful investigation, Huihui discovered that he had hooked up with a beautiful female classmate while he was studying for an MBA. The female netizen acted coquettishly and said she didn't want to go to work, so he would withdraw five dollars from his bankbook every month. A thousand yuan was given to a female netizen for living expenses, and she was more filial than her son. The poor woman worked hard and not only supported a man, but also supported this husband's girlfriend.

Failure case: The man who was "raised" was very hurt

Five years ago, Xue Feng came back from college in Beijing and looked forward to working together in Hefei with his girlfriend of three years. . His family was poor, his mother worked as a nanny in a private company, and the only daughter of the company owner fell in love with him. So the boss gave Xue Feng's mother a salary increase, even held a family birthday party for her, and promised to give Xue Feng a high position in the company, live in a villa and have a private car. Under the encouragement of his mother and the temptation of material things, Xue Feng gave up his old girlfriend's wedding ring, put on his new wife's wedding ring, and became a corporate executive by the river where they once vowed to be together! But after getting married, Xue Feng gradually discovered that no matter how outstanding he was at work, he could not get involved in the core decisions of the company; the woman had to take the lead in trivial matters at home, and the children also had adopted surnames. When quarreling, his wife's favorite thing to say was : "You don't think it's good here, you can go back!" But how to go back? Where are you going back to? Xue Feng knew in his heart that from the moment he put on the wedding ring, he signed a contract of betrayal, and the path he chose would only lead to darkness!

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Agree

Hanjiang male, 31 years old, public institution

In love At that time, almost all women were shouting: We want equality, not discrimination, we want feminism! But you will suddenly find that when you get to the point where you want to get married, she will say: Where is the house? Where's the car? Will you support me after we get married? The tone was very confident. There is nothing wrong with people being equal, but calling for equality and asking for rights while reaching out for a house or a car is a bit strange. The obligation to co-author should be abolished, but the right to be raised should be retained. What is the reason?

There are many friends around me whose wives earn more and their husbands earn less, but I think they all live a good life. For my friend’s birthday, his wife gave him a car. Don’t mention it too much. Envious. Will the world be peaceful if a man raises a woman? What should be nourished should be nourished, and what should be disbanded should be disbanded!

Hai Lan, female, 26 years old, finance

Is marriage just a long-term meal ticket? What I want is not a meal ticket. I can earn that meal ticket myself and have already earned it. So why should I force my lover to earn more meal tickets? What I want is happiness, and what I want is happiness, and these cannot be achieved just because he earns thousands more yuan, nor will they be lost just because he earns thousands less yuan. I understand that some sisters feel unbalanced because of their high income. I have also experienced it - why should I earn money and others spend it? So, conversely, if he earns money and you spend it, will you be balanced? Then will he also ask, does he owe you anything in his previous life? If you are unhappy, it is not a matter of who pays, but something is wrong with your relationship or your concept.

Opposition

Gudeng, a 36-year-old male engineer

No matter how indifferent a man is, he will not be willing to be "raised" by a woman for the rest of his life. There is certainly something in this The male chauvinism in the bones of men is at work, but from another perspective, if a woman sincerely wants to "raise a man", there must be some strong emotions of a "copycat queen" in her character. Such a woman They are often flamboyant, competitive in their careers, and even demanding perfection in social interactions and at home! This not only provokes men's psychological bottom line, but also people with this kind of personality, whether men or women, at work or at home, are relatively annoying and difficult to deal with. If the man being "raised" has a strong self-esteem, Yunnan Baiyao and safflower oil are essential in the home; even if the man is cowardly by nature, OK, just wait to be cuckolded. Temporary forbearance will only lead to greater success. betray! Raising a man - raising a man's body, but breaking his heart!

Wandou, female, 28 years old, civil servant

Talk about this topic, I feel like talking about raising chickens and cats, I don’t feel much. However, just like raising chickens and cats, I reject "raising men" from the bottom of my heart. I have always believed that whoever holds the financial power in a family determines who takes the lead in the family.

When I had my baby for a while, I was at home on vacation and had no financial resources. All the expenses at home came from my husband. Every time I reached out to ask for something from him,

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