“It’s the Spring Festival again, and it’s so hard to see my parents! In the middle of the night, I sigh about my father smoking, and in the daytime, I remember my mother’s warnings. Oh, when will I be able to take my daughter-in-law home to meet my parents?” - Netizen "The Frog Prince" wrote this on his QQ personalized signature. He said: "Every Spring Festival when I visit relatives and friends, everyone always asks me about life-long events. Older young people like me have a little New Year phobia..."

It's the New Year again, and netizens "Frog" "Prince" There are many young people who have the same troubles. The Spring Festival is getting closer and closer, and the "leftover men and leftover women" are becoming more and more troubled. They see others going home in pairs, but they are alone and have difficulty explaining to their parents, relatives and friends. Therefore, in order to take care of their parents' mood, they also It is a rare and joyful reunion at home, and "renting a friend to go home for the New Year" has quietly become popular...

Telling

Renting a boyfriend for ten thousand yuan

1 On March 19, in the blog group, a post titled "Ice Beauty Urgently Rent a Boyfriend" attracted everyone's attention. "Bing Beauty" whose blogger name is Bingqing posted a handwritten message on the Internet "Asking to rent a boyfriend to go home for the New Year." The content is roughly as follows: Because my mother stipulates that I don't bring my boyfriend with me, I am not allowed to go home for the New Year. Now I am sincerely renting a boyfriend. Applicants must be between 25-28 years old, sunny and handsome, and have no bad habits. Graduated from the Chinese Department, good eloquence and fluent in Mandarin. Being elegant and humorous will please the elderly. Rental time is from 9 am to 9 pm on New Year's Eve (no overnight stays). The total rental fee is 10,000 yuan, (you are responsible for air tickets, accommodation, and food expenses by yourself), if you are the one!

This was originally a rental advertisement for a girl from Peking University. After it was posted online, Bingqing felt that they had a common need, so she used it to make her own advertisement picture.

What kind of girl is Bingqing? Why would she think of renting a boyfriend? What's the ending of Friendship Search? After contacting her through QQ, the reporter learned that the beautiful Bingqing graduated from a prestigious university in Beijing and now works in foreign trade sales in a company in Shenzhen. In the eyes of others, she is definitely an "outstanding" girl: she has a beautiful appearance and a good income. . This year is the year of her birth year as she was born in the Year of the Ox. A 24-year-old girl is at an awkward age. Due to her insistence on finding a man who suits her heart, and also because of the busy work and life in Shenzhen, Bingqing unknowingly missed out on what her parents thought was the best. When I was in love, I accidentally fell into the group of "leftover women".

“The day to go home is getting closer day by day. While others are looking forward to the Spring Festival holiday, I am thinking, who can accompany me to go home for the New Year?”

The never-changing topic on the phone between Bingqing’s parents is: You’re not young anymore. Let’s bring a boyfriend home. Don’t let us worry about you all the time, okay? What’s even funnier is that Bingqing’s mother said, “I really can’t find a suitable one outside. I’ll find one for you at home. You go home for a blind date during the Chinese New Year.” Bingqing said, “I hate blind dates. Marriage is a lifelong thing. Who can guarantee that you will know at one glance that the other person is suitable for you?"

Bingqing once fell in love, and that love only left her with pain. From then on, Bingqing never wanted to fall in love again. "But, I am a good child and I don't want my parents to worry about me. Every time my mother calls, she will say that her health is not very good and she doesn't know how long she can live. She doesn't want to go to heaven with regrets." In order to avoid the nagging of my parents. , so that they would no longer worry, Bingqing promised her parents on the phone: "I will definitely bring my boyfriend home during the Spring Festival."

Now that the Spring Festival is approaching, her boyfriend still has no whereabouts. She has no choice but to come up with this plan and wants to "rent" her boyfriend back home. Just to give my parents comfort when I go home for the New Year. Bingqing said that the lease period starts from the 30th day of the new year to the second day of the first lunar month, a total of three days. The rent is 10,000 yuan. Speaking of this temporary "boyfriend", Bingqing hopes to be between 25-30 years old, with good moral character, in good health, over 170cm tall, with no bad habits, and with a formal job. In order to avoid being deceived, Bingqing said that you must see the other party's ID card, original academic certificate, and unit work permit. If the conditions are met, sign a contract in duplicate.

Currently, the click-through rate of Bingqing’s posts has reached more than 200, and there are many replies and applicants. Some are eager to try, some are doubtful, but none have met Bingqing’s requirements.

Phenomena

What I fear the most is “care” from relatives and friends

Bingqing is not the only one who has this idea. On January 20, this newspaper published similar news. Ms. Zhao, who is nearly 20 years old, posted on the Internet that she rented her boyfriend to go home for the New Year. There are more than 1 million web pages about "renting a girlfriend" and "renting a boyfriend" on the search engine Google alone. Among them, "comforting parents and traveling for the New Year" have become common motivations for "renting friends", and many of them have clearly stated prices. of. Data from the China Wedding Network shows that the number of people participating in website dating has increased by 30% in recent times.

Although many urban single men and women have not taken the action of "renting a boyfriend to go home for the New Year", deep down they are afraid of going home during the Spring Festival.

Faced with the concerns of her relatives and friends about her "life-long event," Xiaoxiao, a 28-year-old girl who works as a clerk in a real estate company in Urumqi High-tech Zone, feels physically and mentally exhausted. After graduating from university in 2000, he has been working in Urumqi. She is an only child and returns to her hometown to reunite with her parents every Chinese New Year. "The result is that I am more and more unhappy every time, because as I grow older, the issue of being single has become an unavoidable topic for everyone." Xiaoxiao said that she felt very embarrassed every time, and her parents stood aside. Forget her nagging, the problem is that the "concern" of many relatives and friends makes her feel that they are always looking at her in a strange way. On New Year's Day last year, Xiaoxiao received 8 uncomfortable "concerns" in one day. At noon, her uncle, uncle, and aunt came to her house for a gathering. In addition to talking about her work, all three relatives I asked her if she had found a partner and when she would take him home. When she heard that she hadn’t decided yet, she advised her, “We can’t delay this matter any longer, and we can’t ask too high of other people’s conditions. The key is character.” After this incident, During dinner, I had to face the same "concern" while gathering with my uncle and his family outside. After the day's family gathering was over, Xiaoxiao could finally go outside to have a relaxing karaoke with her classmates, but three married classmates came to "concern" her again. "After being 'concerned' eight times a day, I no longer have confidence in myself. I feel that my personal problems have really become a serious issue that worries my relatives and friends." Xiaoxiao confided her helplessness to reporters.

The reporter learned from a single white-collar QQ group that this year many single older young people stayed at home during the Chinese New Year and did not go anywhere in order to avoid the "interference" of relatives and friends. Some people simply don’t go home and spend the New Year online, playing games, and watching movies.

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Controversy

Filial piety or deception

For "renting friends to celebrate the New Year", Netizens had mixed reactions. A recent online survey showed that 14.29% of netizens chose “yes” to the question “If you didn’t have a female (male) friend, would you rent one to take home for the New Year?” because “if your family members are urging you, it’s better to just rent one first” Bring one back to deal with it”; while 85.17% of people chose “no”, they thought “if you don’t have one, you don’t have one, it would be awkward to rent one”. 36. 54% of people think that "renting a female (male) friend to go home for the New Year" is "normal and a good idea", while 63.46% of people think that "it's not very good, and family members will be heartbroken if they know about it."

Netizen "Ye Fan" said in the message: I firmly disagree with this approach. It is a harm to everyone and is irresponsible, especially for girls. , should be more cautious. Netizen "jane" even said that the post should be blocked. Love is a serious matter and should be based on true feelings. The most frightening thing is that it may give some criminals an opportunity to take advantage of it.

Some people also think that "renting" a friend is better than making a lifelong commitment, and it is also a sign of filial piety. Netizen "Xiao Zi" told her similar experience in the thread. She was depressed due to an immature relationship in college. After work, she fell in love several times and went on many blind dates, but she had a terrible "feeling". ” Let her “other half” still fly in the sky. As the saying goes, "The emperor is not in a hurry, but the eunuch is." Her parents would lecture her on this issue on the phone every week. Now that the New Year is approaching, her mother sees that the ideological work has been done but not done, so she gave an ultimatum: "If you don't bring a boy back for the New Year this year, don't come back to celebrate the New Year." So she also made a plan to "rent friends".

A netizen signed by Li Liuhe posted, "Society should understand and tolerate this kind of well-intentioned deception." He believes that "men should be married when they are older, and girls should be married when they are older" is what Chinese parents think. The inherent concept is that children have not become friends due to various reasons. In order to make their parents not disappointed and make them happy during the New Year, they rent a boyfriend (girl) to go home to celebrate the New Year, resolve the crisis, and conduct good-natured deception to their parents, and their children The heart should be said to be an expression of filial piety. Just as there are many white lies in current social life, they are understandable and tolerable and cannot be blamed blindly.

Experts

It is not advisable to advocate

"Young people rent friends of the opposite sex to take home during the Spring Festival to comfort their parents. From a personal point of view, it is understandable, but this behavior can easily bring unnecessary consequences. I think it is inappropriate to promote disputes and even endanger personal and property safety," said Yu Xiuhua, a national second-level psychological counselor and a psychological counselor at Xinjiang Taineng Training School.

Yu Xiuhua analyzed that the phenomenon of "renting friends" has emerged in recent years. The fundamental reason is that in the process of urbanization, the work pressure of white-collar workers in the workplace has gradually increased, personal time has decreased, and the living circle has gradually shrunk. , making it difficult for white-collar workers to find their significant other.

Yu Xiuhua hypothesized three endings for "renting a boyfriend home": "First, the old man accepted the rented boyfriend and decided that he was his son-in-law! How will you explain it to your parents in the future? Second Second, everyone carries a lot of information. After just a few days of getting along, you feel at peace if the old man doesn't accept him - great. Does the rented person feel better? He is not just a rented item. He is a living person and he will react. Third, you have a good impression of him and have a good impression of him, but the other person is unaware. What should you do? Or the other person has a good impression of you and his family approves of him, but you If you don’t agree, what should you do? The relationship between you, the tenant, and your parents can lead to all kinds of unexpected developments.

“You cannot rent a boyfriend home either emotionally or rationally. "Yu Xiuhua said that honoring parents is not just about finding someone to go home for the New Year. On the surface, it makes parents happy. In fact, many parents are aware of it. Once exposed, it will cause greater harm to parents. Regarding the true love of the older generation for their children, there should be no emotional equation between real boyfriends and rented boyfriends. They should be honest and communicate with their parents heart to heart. No matter what the parents say, then. It’s all a happy chatter.

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