Before marriage, we were in love with each other under the moonlight, like glue; after marriage, we were even more tender and sweet. But after the honeymoon, due to returning to reality from the intoxicating fantasy life, there is a certain sense of psychological fatigue, loss and emptiness. When two people combine to form a family, they have certain constraints on each other. In addition, the shattered idols, the confusion about the new life, the differences in economic views, the constant exposure of shortcomings, the disharmony in sexual life, and the monotony of life and family. Due to the complexity of interpersonal relationships, conflicts arise spontaneously, diluting the passion during the honeymoon and causing psychological disorders after marriage.

Psychological factors are the key to "sexual happiness"

People tend to pay too much attention to the skills in sex. Once they find that "it doesn't work", they are also accustomed to blaming themselves or the other party's physical problems, and improve their physical performance through various means. Many times, they put their efforts in the wrong place.

A domestic study on the etiology classification of ED (erectile dysfunction) patients involving 628 people showed that psychological problems accounted for 39%. Experts said that among male ED patients, tension, stress, depression, anxiety, and marital discord are common conditions. In fact, they have no physical problems at all. Experts have encountered such an example in the outpatient clinic: a patient around 40 years old found that he had repeatedly "failed" in sex. Coupled with some complaints from his wife, "not having sex" became his nightmare. But at the same time, he discovered that when masturbating, he could "show off his strength again." It was only later when I sought medical treatment that I realized that ED was entirely caused by psychological problems.

For women, psychological factors are even more important. According to clinical statistics, women are three times more likely to suffer from sexual dysfunction than men. Among them, frigidity, difficulty in sexual arousal, and vaginismus are all related to psychology. Experts point out that most women are emotional, and emotional gaps, lack of confidence in their body shape, excessive life and work pressure, and anxiety may cause them to lose interest in sex.

Judging from age, one of the major "killers" of sex among young and middle-aged people is obviously work. A survey on the causes of "sexless marriages" showed that 33.4% lacked sex due to too much work pressure. "Many young and middle-aged people simply don't have the time and energy to enjoy sex due to the high pressure of survival, which leads to anxiety, depression, etc.," experts said.

The elderly believe that sex is a matter for young people, or they avoid sex because they worry about their sexual function declining. Various sexual dysfunction problems may be further aggravated if there is no sexual stimulation for a long time.

When the relationship becomes dull and the novelty begins to disappear, the importance of psychological factors becomes apparent, which can completely make marriage and sexual relationships last longer. Experts point out that communication is the best way to solve many problems in sex. Therefore, when you find that your husband is "no longer in glory" or your wife is "as still as water", you must not complain or use sarcastic remarks to ridicule them. Just tell the person, "I feel good, but it could be better." This way, his or her self-confidence will increase and he will appreciate your thoughtfulness. For the elderly, in addition to substantial sex, kissing and hugging are also good means of intimacy. In addition, because women are often passive during sex, they often lose the process of enjoying sex by blindly accommodating their partners, which leads to frigidity and so on. Experts believe that women can tell their partners frankly, "I don't like this way", otherwise he will think you are enjoying it.

6 reasons why women are sexually frigid

1. Just gave birth to a child. After giving birth, women are physically tired and worried about their figure, which will affect their sexual desire. At this time, the husband's encouragement can help the wife increase her sexual confidence.

2. It is too stressful to hold multiple roles of "mother, employee and wife". Working multiple jobs at home and outside the home, as well as the stress of modern life, can cause changes in female hormone levels and disrupt the sexual response cycle. Experts suggest that arranging your life reasonably and taking a hot bath can help relieve stress and improve the sex life of couples.

3. Depression and mischief. Depression can lead to a sudden loss of sexual interest. Some medications can prevent orgasm. Psychotherapy and expert guidance should be considered to improve physical and mental health.

4. Vaginitis. Increased vaginal discharge, itching, burning, etc. can make women not want to have sex. If not treated in time, it will lead to more health problems, such as premature birth, postpartum infection, pelvic inflammatory disease, etc.

5. Vaginal dryness during menopause. Decreased estrogen levels and vaginal dryness can lead to pain during sexual intercourse and make you no longer want to have sex. It is recommended to use estrogen ointment or lubricant.

6. Pain during sexual intercourse on top of a man. Certain intercourse positions may be more likely to cause pain during intercourse due to the tilt of the uterus. Dr. Mary Jane Minken, an obstetrician and gynecologist at Yale University School of Medicine, recommends using the woman-on-top position.