When talking to us, a student who wanted to apply for a doctoral degree said that he regarded sex life as a "homework" to complete. His research work is very heavy, and he has to prepare for exams. In the face of competition, he must maintain a passionate fighting spirit every day. After returning home, I have to be a very "active man" again. As a result, he felt very tired, exhausted physically and mentally, and gradually lost interest in sex life. Another gentleman complained that his wife was too proactive about sex, which dampened his original desire for conquest and enthusiasm, and he felt overwhelmed by this.

Most men feel uneasy about the inevitable decrease in sexual desire after marriage. So I often avoid sex, and the original interest gradually turns into a burden. In this regard, we must first admit the existence of the problem; then tell them clearly that they are not sick; and finally point out that the key to the problem is deviations in psychological adjustment, and some vague or misunderstandings.

To get rid of the dilemma of sex life, you should do the following:

1. There is no standard standard for the number of times you have to have sex. That is to say, the position of sexual life must be correct. For some couples, having sex once a month is more effective and satisfying for both parties. And some people may have sex five times a week to feel satisfied. These are individual differences and cannot be enforced. As long as both parties meet each other sincerely and express their feelings clearly, they will be in harmony and will not be suspicious of each other, otherwise a vicious cycle will form. Many men measure their sexual ability by "number of times." In fact, the quality of sex life is more important. Break this superstition and there will be no anxiety.

2. Sensual contact does not necessarily mean sexual behavior. Men generally believe that sexual contact must include sexual intercourse, which is wrong. Sex life includes many aspects, and it does not necessarily have to be accompanied by the excitement of sexual intercourse every time. Women know this fact best: as long as there is some sense of thoughtfulness, it is enough. That is to say, when your wife takes the initiative to hug you, she does not necessarily ask you to "really do it". Maybe she is just looking for a warm feeling.

3. Carry out in a planned manner. Make love should also be planned, only in this way can there be tacit cooperation between husband and wife. In fact, it is also a very sensual enjoyment for two people to make a "sex life plan". For example, a man complained: "My wife usually likes to have sex after finishing the housework and waiting for the children to fall asleep, but I just can't get up at this time." As a result, "sex" was not at the right time, and we were not happy with each other. And sleep. It can be seen that setting a "plan" is very important.

4. Play some romantic tricks. When the couple is alone together, they can light candles and have dinner; or they can cover their legs with a blanket, watch the moon on the balcony, chat, and relive the tenderness of first love... Nowadays, many couples also have a fashionable "lover's way of making love", that is, from time to time Go to the hotel to spend the night. Enjoying sex life in a casual way often makes you feel particularly relaxed, which can not only reduce stress, but also enhance the intimacy between husband and wife. Love has no fixed formula, and neither does sex. Remember, there is joy in creation itself. Another point is that there is no best way in the world, only the way that suits you.

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