Last week, the editorial department received a letter written by a girl named Yansha. The lines were full of distress and doubts: "My boyfriend and I met four months ago. Come on, he is the ideal husband in my mind. He is tall, handsome and has a successful career. The most important thing is that he loves me very much. We have already met both parents and we are determined to talk about marriage, but at present. So far, we have not had sex, but just a few days ago, I accidentally found condoms in my boyfriend’s pocket!”

"Although my boyfriend kept explaining that he was worried about emergencies so as not to hurt me, a huge shadow cast over my heart. My boyfriend actually carried a condom with him. Is he a very frivolous and casual person? He should still Is there another woman? Has he always been like this or has he become like this since he met me? My head becomes as big as a table when I think about it!"

Yansha's problem is also a problem for many girls. , why does he carry a condom with him? Are men who carry condoms bad men? How bad?

We invited three guests to see what their respective opinions are -

Men who carry condoms cannot be trusted

Ge Chen is 24 years old English teacher

If I find this man wearing a condom at all times, I 100% think there is something wrong with this man. Let alone having a relationship with him, it is worth my while whether I want to continue to have a relationship with him in the future. consider.

I think it is impossible for a normal good man to carry a condom with him. After all, it is a very personal item and can easily cause misunderstandings. On the one hand, I would think that this man is very frivolous. Perhaps, he is just thinking about having fun when he is dating me, and he is just waiting for a suitable opportunity. Because this opportunity is uncertain, he always equips himself with props. . Secondly, I would question this man’s character. Does he have many women? Is it particularly rich in romance? Are you riding on several boats at the same time when you are dating me? Or is it that no matter which woman she is, he can have sex with her at will?

I believe that many women will have the same thoughts as me, not because women are naturally suspicious, nor because they have conservative and feudal ideas. Apart from anything else, convenience stores are everywhere nowadays, right? Just take a few steps in the streets and alleys, and you're guaranteed to find a convenience store popping up in less than five minutes. With the development of society, concepts have become more open. Condoms can be purchased at any convenience store. As for a grown man, is wearing a condom like a talisman every day? ! Are you so desperate that you can't even wait for five minutes? So if this man doesn’t regard his girlfriend as a tool for venting, he must be a nymphomaniac; or will the passion subside after a 5-minute walk? Then this man either has a psychological problem or is suffering from sexual dysfunction.

No matter what the assumption is, no matter what the excuse is, it is an abnormal phenomenon for a man to be fully equipped and ready to go at all times. Men always like to attribute the answers to all questions to one word "love", but the fact is often that not everything can be explained by "just one word love".

Western philosophers say that a woman’s IQ is zero when she falls in love. I would say that not all women are like that, not myself. After all, for a woman, love is her soul and her body is part of her soul. The moment you hand over your soul must be done only after careful consideration. A woman who is responsible for love and herself will only give herself to a reliable man, and will never be blinded by an instant burst of enthusiasm.

A responsible man who truly loves a woman must give his girlfriend the greatest degree of honesty and respect. In the last step of having sex, you must get the woman's permission and consent. This is the most basic courtesy of a gentleman. I don’t know if wearing a condom at all times is offensive and obscene, but what is certain is that such a man is basically hard to believe. To entrust yourself to such a person is undoubtedly to push yourself to the edge of the cliff.

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Woman, your name is picky

Daqi 28-year-old marketing planner

A long time ago, Confucius once said: "Only villains and women are difficult to raise." It was really prescient. ah. I just don't understand why women are always so picky. Nowadays, there are so few men who are willing to wear condoms. Carrying a condom with them shows that this man is a gentleman and a very civilized man. Why are he being suspected? ! Women will scold you if you don't wear a condom, and you will be scorned by women if you carry a condom with you. It's really not easy to be a man. I really feel sorry for the buddy in the letter.

Women always say that men don’t like smart women. In fact, this is not the case. The key point is that 99% of intelligent women are suspicious. Therefore, to be precise, men do not like suspicious women. For example, when you wrote to this lady, you are a bit too thoughtful, right? ! Women always have menstruation every month, right? In order to be on guard against unexpected menstruation, don’t women also carry sanitary napkins with them?

In fact, why condoms are called "safety" condoms is because they should be carried with you to prevent accidents from happening to ensure safety. If on a date, our girlfriend dresses up too sexy, we men sometimes have trouble controlling it, and the situation may happen at any time. If we try to remedy the situation afterwards, it will be too late. It is better to take precautions for a rainy day. To be honest, unless he loves his woman very much, who would be willing to wear a condom? The difference between not wearing it and wearing it is extraordinary. Why bother yourself and have to put a layer of things between you? Isn’t it because we feel sorry for our women who take medicine and hurt their health, so we will be more considerate and consciously wear condoms.

Our work pressure is high and the workload is heavy. While enjoying love, we have to bear the suspicion of our girlfriends. Then love is as tiring as work, so why don’t we let people live? !

Sometimes, women always like to get into trouble, and they will spend a long time thinking about the smallest things. Not only will they bother others, but they will also be exhausted mentally and physically. Why bother? If your man has another woman, why bother carrying a condom with him? He can just go into battle and it's over. Anyway, it's just for fun. If it's just for fun with you, then it's even less likely to wear a condom at all times.

If a gentleman loves his woman, he will be responsible and be ready to protect his woman at any time, considering the unexpected situation that may occur at any time. There's a song that goes like this: "A man shouldn't make a woman cry, at least I'll try my best." If you hurt your woman because of your own negligence, you're not even a good man, so from now on In order to be considerate to his girlfriend, a man should take care of everything. Carrying a condom with you shows that a man is rigorous, responsible and a gentleman.

What women are best at is "divergent thinking". The result of divergent thinking is that they cannot understand a man's true feelings. Often our men's tender love is misinterpreted by such inertial thinking. Woman, your name is picky.

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Moderator’s point of view: Not all those who carry condoms are bad men

Pan Shen, 30 years old, gender columnist

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