Recently, the Internet has expressed concerns about the future marriage issues of the "post-80s generation". Some people believe that most of the "post-80s" generation are only children. Their weaknesses such as selfishness, arrogance, inability to tolerate, and fear of responsibility are completely contradictory to the compromise, cultivation, hard work, responsibility, support, and tolerance that marriage requires. This is likely to lead to a crisis in the marriages of this generation in the future. In this regard, our reporter interviewed two experts on youth issues and asked them to share their views on this issue. "Post-80s" will pursue the true feeling in marriage

"I think these worries are all unfounded!" Lu Shizhen, secretary of the Party Committee of China Youth University for Political Science, does not agree with the many accusations against the "post-80s generation" in the current society.

Lu Shizhen believes that compared with those who used to talk about the country and the collective, the generation born in the 1980s is more practical and they emphasize and value self-development more. But at the same time, they may also have some problems, such as a weak sense of responsibility, poor interpersonal skills, a weak ability to withstand setbacks, etc.

As for the marriage of the "post-80s generation", Lu Shizhen said that on the one hand, from the perspective of modern values ​​and our generation, we feel that they may lack a sense of responsibility and have poor living ability; but from another perspective, they may be working harder. Pursuing the real feeling in marriage, we are trying to adapt to the new form of marriage in the future in which emotional factors will play a more prominent role in the entire marriage.

Lu Shizhen believes that when you see that the "post-80s generation" conflicts with our actual values, there is no need to worry, because any generation coexists with creativity, vitality and destructive power. "When we adhere to tradition and worry about the lack of tolerance and irresponsibility of the '80s generation', we must also notice that there is something in them that points to the future. Take a look at their nature and think about their future. We We must believe that they will continue to learn how to get along with each other in practice.” Therefore, Lu Shizhen believes that for those born in the 1980s, what they need more may not be worry, but tolerance and empathy.

In response to some media pointing out that the poor sense of responsibility of the "post-80s generation" may make them "treat marriage as child's play" and make the older generation "worry", the Secretary of the Party Committee of Beijing No. 4 Middle School who has been teaching for decades Zhang Yunshang believes that "this is not so absolute."

"The phenomenon of marriages breaking up and reuniting is related to the general social environment, and it is not a problem that will appear in the future." Zhang Yunshang said that according to traditional Chinese concepts, marriage and divorce were originally very cautious matters, but after the opening up to the outside world, Westerners The concept of the country has a great influence on young people. "Many people do not particularly value this. If two people are happy, they will stay together. If they are unhappy, they will break up. But this will not affect everyone. There will still be a group of people who are more traditional. Including 'post-80s'".

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The shortcomings of the "post-80s generation" are common problems among only children

Zhang Yunshang found that compared with students born in the 1970s, the "post-80s generation" has many advantages over the previous generation, such as the pursuit of individuality, strong expression and performance skills, and broad vision.

As for the shortcomings of the so-called "post-80s generation" that many people are not used to, Zhang Yunshang analyzed that these are not unique to them, but are common problems among only children.

"Why do children with brothers and sisters in the family often have better interpersonal skills and mentality than only children? Because they grew up together, and the older ones naturally know how to take care of their younger siblings; they also fight during play, but During the fight, they are also learning how to fight and get along, so the process of children's growth is actually a socialization process, but this link is missing in the growth of today's only children. ”

"Any generation must have a process of inheritance." Lu Shizhen analyzed that as an independent generation living in the era of reform and opening up, the "post-80s" are destined to have some characteristics that are different from others, and some of these characteristics may be different. Good things, "but this does not prevent them from occupying a certain position in China's cultural inheritance and social development."

Zhang Yunshang believes that for the "post-80s generation" themselves, first of all, they must understand that developing good habits will benefit them throughout their lives. It takes a process to develop good habits, but it is easy to destroy them once you want to indulge yourself. Secondly, you should learn to listen to the advice of adults. It should be said that most people who give you advice want to help you, and you need to understand everyone's starting point.

Zhang Yunshang hopes that those born in the 1980s will understand that they will always have to walk their own path in the future, and they cannot spend their whole lives lying next to their parents. Therefore, one must have independent consciousness and ability, including self-reliance in life.

Lu Shizhen also kindly reminded the "post-80s generation" that when they show off their individuality without scruples, they should also think about tradition, because the intergenerational inheritance of any society is a link between the past and the future. When standing in isolation from a one-sided perspective, This connection cannot be built well, and condemnation and rebellion both mean rupture.

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