"I, 29 years old, a single woman. The appearance is beautiful, and it is a generous type of temperament. I have a bachelor's degree, and the piano and guzheng can perform. The work is a white -collar worker. The most important thing is that I am kind. Well-educated. However, even if the conditions are so good, I don’t know where to look for a lover. I don’t know who I can marry. As soon as I graduated from college, my relatives started to introduce me to partners. Of course, there were not many, but the working conditions Not bad. But I don’t like any of them. I pay special attention to the feeling.

Now as time goes by, at the age of 29, which is an embarrassing age, I myself have realized the urgency of the problem - but the circle is too small, where should I go to find my lover? Or should I fall in love and get married with the person I have around me but who I don’t really have feelings for? I want to take the postgraduate entrance examination to realize my dream of finding someone I like who has an elegant temperament and outstanding knowledge. But do you think this is realistic? "

Around me, more and more outstanding women are saying: "What should I do? I can't find my husband! I can't get married! ”

Of course, most of the women who say this are like the woman in the letter, who is not bad, has a proud appearance and academic qualifications, and has several unique talents and skills.< /p>

However, good girls cannot get married. In this huge world, they cannot find anyone to marry. Of course, it's not that they really can't find someone willing to marry them, but that they can't find a man who is willing to marry her and she is willing to marry him.

Yes, the reason why a woman cannot get married is often not the fault of the man, but the fault of herself - you expect the man to be too beautiful, but in fact no man can achieve the goals you expect!

In real life, there are men with "elegant temperament" and "excellent knowledge", but these two qualities are often the product of years of accumulation. Young men do not have that calmness, but men who have that calmness often As I enter middle age, I am already the father of someone else’s child! You want everything ready-made, and it's very difficult to get a super-perfect, super-mature, super-smart man in one step. Unless you pick up a "second-hand" one and become the stepmother of a middle-aged divorced man's child, it would be really, really hard to find that kind of perfect Mr. Model! Of course, if you are really asked to marry a "divorced man", you will feel unbalanced: How embarrassing for such an outstanding girl to marry a "second-hand man"!

So, a woman’s marriage is a psychological secret war, a process in which she constantly defeats herself, or in other words, a process in which she constantly compromises with herself. Many women always think that their excellent conditions and outstanding looks are a blessing in marriage. However, in real life, they find that the better off a woman is, the more difficult her marriage will be. Women with average conditions have relatively peaceful and rational requirements for marriage, and can often find a satisfactory destination in the shortest possible time. But women with extremely good conditions have many problems: I am so beautiful, I need to find someone with the same appearance; I am so talented, I need to find someone with a matching IQ; I am so versatile, I need to find someone who knows how to appreciate...

When a woman checks out these conditions one by one and puts them into practice, she will realize: Why is this world so small that you can’t even find a man who is a good match for me? !

So, many women like you will attribute the reason to "narrow circle" and "no chance to meet better men". Of course, if you continue to study for a master's or doctorate today, you may still find that you still can't find the kind of man who fully meets my requirements!

It’s really hard to find. The kind of men you want are so rare. They are usually tied up hand and foot by their wives and locked up at home. It’s hard to find other women!

Although you are nearly thirty, you still pay so much attention to "feeling". This is a woman's persistence and a woman's stupidity. Yes, some people have feelings for each other as soon as they meet, and some people develop feelings gradually as they get along slowly. As long as you are a man with the same conditions, you should try to get along. For a woman who still hopes to get a perfect marriage, now that she is 30 years old, she does not have much youth for you to squander. Idealistic women often have no realistic ideas. Perfect ending. If you don’t want your conditions to slowly depreciate, you must learn to compromise with reality!

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