One point of view is that the seeds of men's "philandering" have already been planted. As early as the time of apes, every male ape owned a group of female apes. They got this through fighting. Whoever is strong has the right to continue the family line. This is the law of survival of the fittest in nature. Humans evolved from apes. Although this inheritance is too far away, it may not be completely extinct. Besides, after the formation of human beings, for hundreds of thousands of years, especially for thousands of years, polygyny was mostly practiced. Men’s thinking is to love when they can, while women’s thinking is to marry and follow the chicken. These ideas have somewhat formed a certain bad nature, which is condensed in the genetic code and passed on from generation to generation.

"Carefree" is more of a psychological problem

On the surface, a "philandering" person seems to be related to morality, but if you delve deeper into the reasons for his or her behavior, you will find that it is related to the attitudes, emotions and behaviors of his or her caregivers and parents in the original family.

1. Desire to be noticed by everyone

In the practice of psychological counseling, it is often found that "tiger fathers" who do not understand parent-child education have cultivated "dog sons". Because the father is so outstanding, he naturally has higher expectations for his son; and precisely because he is so outstanding, he generally does not praise his children easily. In this way, the child unfortunately lost his father when he was a child - the objective evaluation of the most important person in the process of establishing a sense of self-worth. This will make the child lose his inner self-worth no matter how glorious it is in the eyes of outsiders. The feeling is very low.

If a person with a low sense of self-worth finds it difficult to gain a sense of accomplishment through normal channels, he is likely to use other unorthodox methods, such as Ni Zhen's way of chasing women, to cause trouble to attract people's attention to him.

2. Desire to conquer and protect

Men's nature, due to the effect of male hormones, is to desire to conquer others and protect the weak. If he is a weak person and is "protected" by a woman, then there must be a powerful force hidden in his subconscious that always wants to break free from the hands of the savior.

However, as he grows older and matures, a man begins to desire to be strong and resents the protection of others. Conquering new girls and being worshiped by little girls gave him great psychological satisfaction that he was a strong man.

3. Some "philandering" are actually mental illnesses

Psychologists have summarized the following reasons for the psychology of "playful" people: He (she) did not receive due protection, careful care and selfless love when he (she) was a child. But it is used as "pseudo-love in the name of love", such as control, possession, and jealousy.

A. The heart of a carefree person is empty, like a bottomless black hole with magnetic force. It constantly needs external things or things to fill it, but it can never be filled. It has nothing to do with a person's status, money, or reputation. It's just that these external conditions will create more opportunities to constantly replace people.

B. Carefree people don’t know what they really want? Insecure and worried about the future.

C. People who are flirtatious lack self-confidence and self-esteem, and lack inner strength.

D. Carefree people do not want to take responsibility for others and adopt evasive behavior. Constant change is another kind of evasion.

E. Carefree people always hope to get more praise, respect, recognition and affirmation.

F. Carefree people want to get everything, refuse to give up, and constantly chase the so-called "better".

G. People who are carefree have not been "weaned" psychologically, have not cut the "spiritual umbilical cord" with their parents, and have not yet completed the growth of their psychological age and become a truly independent and psychologically mature person.

H. People who are flirtatious suffer from mental illness because their childhood trauma in the original family did not receive timely treatment. This is a psychological misunderstanding that is often ignored by parents and family members. These psychological traumas are always accompanied by carefree people. They rely on such behavioral defense methods to gain false self-confidence and dignity, and walk helplessly and confusedly in the long river of life with a metal mask that becomes thicker and harder. .

Men's lust is a primitive psychology

Psychological experiments show that images of beautiful women can easily activate the pleasure center of men's brains and make them excited, while plain-looking women cannot do this. The standards of female beauty were formed during the long process of human evolution, and most of them are closely related to fertility. The male brain considers women who meet these criteria to be "beautiful."

Men pay more attention to women’s waist-to-hip ratio

Affected by fashion trends, most girls nowadays are keen on losing weight and pursue "there is no thinnest, only thinner". But, is the "Skinny Fairy" really more charming?

In an experiment, psychologists asked a group of male subjects and female subjects to view 9 photos of women ranging from very thin to very fat, and asked them to choose the ideal female image in their minds. As a result, most women choose a thin female image, while men choose an image that is neither fat nor thin. Judging from this result, if it is to win the favor of men, girls really do not need to make it too difficult for themselves.

In fact, men pay more attention to women's "waist-to-hip ratio" than their body shape. Evolutionary psychologists have found through many experiments that women with a waist-to-hip ratio of less than 0.7 best meet men's standards for a graceful figure. A lower waist-to-hip ratio is a guideline for women's health and fertility. Women with a higher waist-to-hip ratio are more likely to suffer from various diseases and have a harder time getting pregnant. In this sense, men think that women with a low waist-to-hip ratio are more beautiful, and they also focus on the "interests of genes."

2-month-old baby boy can already look at "beautiful girls"

This is an experiment that will disappoint a lot of people with humanity. Evolutionary psychologists found a lot of pictures of both men and women. They divided the pictures into four groups according to their sexual attractiveness, namely "attractive women", "ordinary women", "attractive men", and "ordinary men"; and then , they recruited a group of men (i.e., experimental subjects) who had their brains scanned by MRI while looking at pictures. It was found that when they looked at attractive women, the nucleus accumbens area of ​​their brains became highly active, which has long been shown to be the pleasure center of the brain. Therefore, in life, when a man sees a beautiful woman, his eyes light up, and the control of the nucleus accumbens is by no means a "floating cloud".

Moreover, when a man is still a baby, his preference for beautiful women is already formed. In an experiment with male babies, psychologists first asked adult men to rank some pictures of women in order of sexual attractiveness, and then presented these pictures to the male babies. Experimental results show that even 2-3-month-old male babies will look at pictures of "attractive women" for a longer period of time, especially 6-8-month-old male babies. This experimental result proves to a certain extent that men’s psychological preference for beautiful women has a strong genetic mechanism.

Strong fertility is the original psychological instinct

Men naturally love beautiful women. Does this contain the secret of human evolution? Scientists have found that a female face recognized as "beautiful" by the vast majority of men must meet at least the following conditions: large eyes, thin chin, plump lips, symmetrical face, and smooth skin. Male brains generally favor young women. Among them, the "public face" composed of female faces aged 14 to 20 is considered the most beautiful. From a physiological point of view, this is the period when women's reproductive ability is strongest.

The standard of beauty does not come out of thin air, but the psychological tendencies evolved by ancient men through generations of natural selection. These tendencies help them select more fertile women, have children with them, and pass on their genes. This psychological mechanism becomes a primitive psychological instinct. So it's not so much that beauty activates the pleasure centers of men's brains, but rather that more fertile women do.

Instinct weakens after exposure

Evolutionary psychologists emphasize that saying that a psychological tendency evolved does not mean that it is unchangeable. For example, if a person has a certain disease-causing gene, it does not mean that he will definitely get sick. On the contrary, when he knows that he has this gene, he can be more vigilant, take more preventive measures, and live longer. longevity.

Similarly, when a man knows that "loving beautiful women" is a primitive psychology, when he encounters the temptation of beautiful women and his brain excitement increases sharply, he will be able to have more conscious power and better control his behavior. Primitive psychological instinct is like a spell. When you are not aware of it, it will control you unconsciously, and once you expose it to the sun, its power will be greatly weakened.