I don’t know when you will see this letter. Maybe by the time you see it, we will have already separated! Or I'm no longer by your side! However, if I were not allowed to speak out some of my inner thoughts, I think I would feel suffocated for the rest of my life. Maybe you didn't expect it, but this time I let go first. I hesitated about this decision for a long, long time. I was tortured and hurt repeatedly, for fear that if I made the wrong move, I would regret it for the rest of my life. But in the end I chose to let go. Although I was really in pain, I hoped you would be happy.

It’s not that I don’t love you anymore, it’s that I don’t dare and can’t continue to love you! Maybe my love for you will never change in my life!

I wish I could be by your side every day and work hard with you. I wish I could see you when I open the door after get off work every day and have dinner with you. How I wish I could cuddle up next to you every night and be warm to each other, how I wish I could hold your hand and be with you forever!

If my life can only end at 22:58:39 on the night of January 17, 2009, then I want you to know that I have three wishes, which are the biggest regrets in my life!

The first one is that I have never traveled alone with you. In the past 10 years, we have been busy with work, family, and life, but we have never truly lived for ourselves. I want to go with you to "Xi'an to see the Terracotta Warriors", to "Mount Tai to see the sunrise", to "Hainan to see the ends of the earth". It would be great just the two of us to wander among the green mountains and green waters! Unfortunately, this will be a fantasy in my lifelong dream and will never be realized.

Second, we have been husband and wife for many years. I have never given birth to a boy or a girl for you. I didn’t like it before, but now I have no chance. I often think that if we have a child, it must be One of the smartest and sweetest kids in the world. Unfortunately, I have lost this power forever and cannot become a complete woman.

Third, I can’t grow old with you. Let’s go to the end of our lives together. Share all the joys, sorrows and joys of this life together. Didn't you always plan to buy the land in the backyard of your hometown and build a big house? When I dream back at midnight, I can always feel the high edge of the house, my favorite well, and the warm little kang. Thick quilt. It's a pity that this dream was shattered too early before I could raise my "husky" and "shepherd dog".

I don’t know how much I loved you. Maybe it’s deeper than the Pacific Ocean. Maybe I won’t be the one you love most in this life, but I may be the one who loves you most in this life. Take one.

We have agreed to break up for a long time. These days, every night when you have social activities, a new girlfriend, and colleagues, how difficult is it for a woman who once deeply loved you to spend one long, dark and lonely night after another? You may never Unable to understand.

Every night you don’t come back, I miss you crazily. I always look at the phone next to me in a daze for a long time, picking it up and putting it down again and again. Even if I forget that phone number, the whole world will never forget it! Every time I dial the last number, I hang up feebly, silently telling myself that I can’t call, I can’t call, and then I shed tears like rain until dawn.

I don’t dare to go shopping at Carrefour. I’m afraid to see the things I liked before. Without your loving companionship, I am alone and feel desolate.

Don’t dare to eat at KFC or McDonald’s? Every time you sit down, when you look up, you always feel that the seat opposite is empty? You once said it would be great if we could eat this every day, but now that we can, you are no longer willing to share it with me. The food didn't taste good, so I gradually stopped eating.

I dare not go to Dabeiyao, Tiananmen, Wangfujing, Beihai, Zoo, Hepingli, Dongzhimen, South Third Ring Road, Zhongguancun... Although Beijing is big, I found that there are too many places filled with happy memories of our past. I can't help but be moved by the scene, and then run away. So one day if you hear that you see a woman crying while walking in a "subway, bus or street" in Beijing, it may be me, because , this is almost my daily experience.

I said, how wonderful it would be if people had no intentions! Without mind, there is no pain and no consciousness. I won’t be sad. In the past few days, I really don’t want to live anymore. I have been thinking about how to free myself. Everyone is mortal. If you live without hope and sustenance, then maybe this is a very important thing. Good relief. Unfortunately, when I thought of my elderly parents, I gave up this idea again and again.

Ten years ago, you broke into my life resolutely and without hesitation, and melted into my blood and bones bit by bit. 10 years later, you pulled away without mercy. go. Do you know how cruel you are? You are tearing apart my bones and peeling off my flesh! The pain of cutting my husband makes me miserable and breaks my heart.

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I am lost, haggard, and extremely thin. I am unhappy every day, and my tears almost flow into a river. I don't know what makes you so lost. Watching me struggling on the edge of pain, it is clear that as long as you gently pull me, I will come back to heaven from hell, but no matter how much I cry, you turn a blind eye.

So I gradually understood that the man who loved me so deeply was really gone. You are no longer the same person you were before, maybe you have already changed. I just simply ignored it. I carefully picked up the heart that was torn into pieces by you. He kept all the tears and sadness to himself and stood up little by little.

I know you don’t want me to get close to you, so I slowly walk away from you. Knowing that you don't like me cuddling next to you, I curl up in my bed no matter how cold the night is. I know you don't want me to pay attention to your affairs, so I won't inquire anymore. I knew you might have a new woman, so I pretended not to know.

I keep telling myself that as long as I work hard enough and don’t give up, you will come back to me one day, and we may be the happiest couple in the world. I will love you with all my life. Let you never regret this decision.

Unfortunately, I worked hard and looked forward to it for a long time, and finally found that this was just my extravagant hope. You no longer love me in your heart, how can you care about what I do. If I give this love of mine to any man, I will get his true love in return. Unfortunately, I can't melt your hard heart.

I also know that you also have reluctance and nostalgia for me in your heart. After all, we have been together every day for the past 10 years. Humans are not grass and trees, so how can they be ruthless? In these most unhappy days, every phone call you made to me and every text message you sent. Every gift you gave me and every meal you cooked brought me so much joy. Little by little, you let me know your reluctance and hesitation towards me, which is also the only motivation that supports me to this day.

But, do you know? These are also the things I hate most about you. I don’t need your sympathy and pity. If you still love me, stay with me. If you fall in love with someone else, please leave. I don’t need sharing and charity love.

This time of farewell, I don’t know if there will be a chance to see you again in the future. I hope you can take care of yourself!

Don’t always wash your feet with cold water, especially in winter. It is very bad for your health. You will know this when you get older.

When sleeping, turn over several times, and it is best not to lie down. Your rhinitis is really serious and your breathing is not smooth. I will no longer be able to help you correct it by your side. I will still do it if I have the chance. Go see a doctor

In winter, remember to wear thicker warm pants underneath, and don’t think that you are rich because you are young. Remember to wear cotton shoes and thick socks, your feet will get cold every year.

Don’t always carry such a heavy schoolbag on your shoulders. You still think your waist is not bent enough!

Don’t watch movies too late. If you can’t sleep, drink some fresh milk. Only when you sleep well will your health be better!

Be sure to have breakfast in the morning and drink less alcohol! Don’t throw up every time you get drunk! You can’t remember the way home. Not every woman can have the physical strength like me to help you home.

Remember to eat a lot of vitamin B2, tomatoes, and bean sprouts. Your mouth always has ulcers, so you should pay attention to it.

Don’t always forget to bring your keys. You will be the only one in this house from now on. Don’t make it impossible for yourself to get in.

Your parents are old, so you should call them more often when you have time. Now that my identity has changed, I can no longer fulfill my filial piety for you.

Don’t keep things in your heart all the time. The result of your harsh words will be that you will feel sad.

If you meet a woman you love, you must know how to cherish it. If you haven't thought about it well, don't easily make a lasting commitment to her. Not all women can choose to fulfill you like me. Love her well and take good care of her. I hope you can grow old together and never be separated.

January 18, 2009 1:28 am

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