The China Marriage and Family Research Association of the All-China Women's Federation, the Matchmaking Industry Committee of the China Social Workers Association and other units recently released the 2009 survey report on the marriage and love situation of urban white-collar workers. The report shows that the social pressure faced by single women is nearly twice that of single men, and the main reason why women are single is that the standards for choosing a spouse are too high.

According to reports, the report is based on the analysis of millions of members of Baihe.com, China’s largest dating website. The organizers adopted various forms such as random street interviews, in-depth interviews, and distribution of questionnaires. A one-year survey was conducted on the marriage and love status of urban white-collar workers. The report shows that single women face multiple pressures from family, relatives, friends, and public opinion. The pressure from public opinion is twice as high as that of single men. Huge social pressure has caused nearly 40% of single women to worry that they will not be able to get married, while only 8.1% of men are worried that they will not be able to marry a wife.

According to the report, women’s mate selection standards are the main lever for balancing supply and demand in the marriage and love market. Women’s mate selection standards are higher than men’s, and their range of choices is relatively narrow. Although they admit that their mate selection standards are relatively narrow, High, but women will not take the initiative to adjust their mate selection standards, and may even miss the best period for mate selection. The survey shows that if they cannot find an ideal partner, only 6.9% of women will lower their requirements for mate selection, while 18% of men will lower their requirements for mate selection.

Fan Aiguo, secretary-general of the China Marriage and Family Research Association of the All-China Women's Federation, said that surveys show that if men are divided into four levels, A, B, C and D, and women are divided into four levels, ABCD, the result will always be A female and D male. The most left. She suggested that women adopt a flexible approach to choosing a spouse, and the range of choices will be much wider.

The report states that 40% of women in my country are worried that they will not be able to get married

The "2009 Chinese People's Marriage and Love Situation Survey Report" was released. The report stated that half of the unmarried people surveyed had been in love several times. On less than one occasion, 40% of women worry that they will not be able to get married.

The report was jointly released by Baihe.com, the China Marriage and Family Research Association of the All-China Women’s Federation, and the Matchmaking Industry Committee of the China Association of Social Work. Using online questionnaires, street follow-ups and interviews, a total of more than 2.028 million questionnaires were collected. The average age of the respondents was 30.77 years old.

The report pointed out that about 50% of people have been in love less than once. Among them, 17.8% have no love experience, and 31.2% have only one love experience. About 30% of the respondents admitted that they did not know how to get along with the opposite sex.

More than 60% of blind daters voluntarily give up after feeling that they may not be accepted.

Nearly 10% of the respondents believe that the unhappiness in marriage and love of the people around them is the main reason why they are single now, especially women, reaching 12.4%.

Data in the report show that nearly 80% of unmarried men and women face pressure from themselves and their families when looking for their spouse. When facing public opinion, the pressure on unmarried women (13.5%) is nearly twice that of men (8%).

Faced with various social pressures, 41.2% of unmarried women worry that they will not be able to get married. Men who worry that they will not be able to marry a wife only account for 8.1% of the total number of people surveyed.

Figures in the report show that 40.1% of women admitted that their standards for selecting a spouse are very high or relatively high. Although they admit that their mate selection standards are relatively high, more than 44.1% of women insist on not lowering their mate selection standards and would rather be deficient than excessive.

In terms of choosing a mate, age is not the most important thing for men. Less than 29.1% of men insist on finding the opposite sex younger than themselves. 51.2% of men are acceptable to women who are 1 to 3 years older than themselves.

According to a China Youth Online report on January 8, after conducting extensive and in-depth investigations into the marriage and love situation of Chinese people for three consecutive years, the China Marriage and Family Research Association of the All-China Women’s Federation, the Matchmaking Industry Committee of the China Association of Social Work, Baihe.com, a dating service website, jointly released the "2009 Survey Report on Chinese People's Marriage and Love Situation" in Beijing.

The report disclosed many common problems among "leftover men and leftover women", such as: "Singles have little love experience", "Giving up has become a habit of dating for singles", "Substitute dating is gradually replacing "Dai Zheng", "Unfortunate Contagious Disease", etc.

The survey report shows that about 50% of the respondents have been in love less than once, and about 30% of the respondents admitted that they do not know how to get along with the opposite sex; giving up has become a habit for singles to date. More than 60% of those who went on a blind date voluntarily gave up after feeling that they might not be accepted by the other party; "surrogate love gradually replaced marriage", some parents have moved to the Internet to help their children find marriage on dating websites; "unfortunate flu", nearly 10% 12.4% of the respondents believe that the misfortunes in marriage and love of people around them are the main reasons why they are single now, especially women.

This report believes that the "overprice theory" (that is, women's mate selection standards have become the main lever for the balance of supply and demand in the marriage and love market) is the root cause of love and marriage problems, and thus puts forward the "psychological beauty" theory to help "Left men and left women" re-establish the concept of mate selection.

Fan Aitian, secretary-general of the China Marriage and Family Research Society of the All-China Women's Federation, said that the main problem faced by many people in choosing a spouse is the vague and impetuous view of marriage and love. Economic pressure, social pressure, and public opinion pressure have caused "leftovers", especially female "high-end leftovers", to lose their clear goals and views on mate selection, and they do not know what kind of marriage life is best for them. And "The person I love has his own name, but the person who loves me is miserable." This situation also exists for many "leftover men".

Chen Yiyun, a professor at the Chinese Academy of Social Sciences and a well-known expert on marriage, family and social issues, believes that the family is the cell of society, marriage is the foundation of the family, and the issue of love and marriage should attract the attention of all sectors of society. He called on "leftover men and leftover women" to strengthen pre-love and pre-marriage training because "pre-marriage training is the starting point for a happy marriage."

According to statistics from the civil affairs department, in 2008, 10.983 million couples registered for marriage and 2.269 million couples went through divorce procedures. The marriageable population in my country in 2008 was 180 million. Based on data from the first three quarters of 2009, it is estimated that 11.7 million couples will register marriages and 2.42 million couples will go through divorce procedures in 2009.

According to the Huashang Daily, the recently released "2009 Chinese People's Marriage and Love Situation Survey Report" shows that in the face of various social pressures, 41.2% of unmarried women worry that they will not be able to get married. Men who worry that they will not be able to marry a wife only account for 8.1% of the total number of people surveyed.

After returning from studying in Japan, Liu Ya (pseudonym) found a job as a financial director in Xi'an High-tech Zone. She has good studies and a good job, but her marriage has not yet been resolved. She has been on blind dates 20 times but has not found a boyfriend. She has compiled an analysis table of men's motivations for dating, which surprised her friends.

Each date

There are 5 angles to analyze the other person’s motivations

“I graduated from a Japanese university in March last year and obtained Japan’s first-level commercial bookkeeping qualification. , which is an accounting certificate. I wanted to find a better boyfriend after returning to China, but I couldn’t find one.” Yesterday, Liu Ya said that after returning to Xi’an, her family and classmates arranged for her to have sex 20 times. All failed, and now it is time to celebrate his 30th birthday, and his family sighs every time he mentions his marriage.

Based on her own blind date experience, Liu Ya made an analysis table of men’s motivations for dating, including when to make an appointment, the specific time for the date, the specific date location, the way to separate after the date, and what to do after the date. After a detailed analysis of five aspects including contact information, I came to the conclusion that I am too rational and too picky. My youth has passed, and it is difficult to feel excited again.

Liu Ya said that if you analyze it, you can actually break it down into more details. For example, you can order food to see whether the other party respects you and whether you can live a good life. "One time, the other party started ordering before I even ordered. , so rude; another time, the other party ordered 8 dishes. I said it was too wasteful for two people, but he said that he had a dog at home and could take it home to feed the dog. ”

In the past two days, Liu Ya sent this analysis list of men’s dating motivations to several friends through QQ, which attracted collective criticism. Some friends responded directly: "You know too much!" Another friend said: "No wonder you can't find it, you are too clear-headed."

Probability Calculation

There are only ten in Xi'an How many people are suitable for her?

There was also a situation that shocked her friends. Liu Ya made a probability calculation based on her requirements for choosing a mate. First of all, it is required that the person is between 32 and 35 years old, and is over 1.72 meters tall; has good facial features and is healthy; has a slender body, loves to be clean, and has no long nails; loves to study, has a master's or doctorate degree; has an elegant temperament; and does not need to be financially wealthy. , you must be free mentally; working near the West High-tech Zone is convenient for dating.

Next calculation: Xi'an has a population of about 8.3 million. If unmarried young people aged 32 to 35 account for 1/3, there will be about 2.76 million people. Northerners are generally tall, with a height of over 1.72 meters Calculated as accounting for 2/3, there are about 1.84 million people; now there are fewer slender people, accounting for 1/3, there are about 610,000 people; those with the highest elimination rate are those with master's or doctorate degrees, and optimistically calculated, there are about 30,000 People comply.

Northwesterners are bold and direct, and the proportion of refined people is calculated as 1/3, which is about 10,000 people; but there are very few who maintain spiritual freedom. If you are not financially wealthy, it is difficult to have spiritual freedom. For example, in order to pay off the mortgage as early as possible, in addition to working hard and not daring to change jobs at will, you also have to be submissive and watch the boss's face. Liu Ya said: "The so-called mortgage when buying a house means that you are pressed to the ground and peeled off. This is how ideals disappear. Calculated in this way, there are only 500 people out of 10,000 people who have the courage to maintain spiritual freedom."

Liu Ya sighed: "If you add in the number. For jobs in the High-tech Zone, if we calculate it based on 1/20, there are only 25 people suitable for me. If we subtract half of the same sex, there are only a dozen people left. But where can we find these dozen people in the huge crowd? ”

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