"Are you an adult? Do you have sexual needs? What if you don't have an ideal lover? Would you choose a one-night stand?"

Some people may be surprised to see the above questions, because Chinese people have always been shy about talking about sex, but in this era of rapid development, no matter how we avoid it, we cannot prevent one-night stands from becoming an established fact as a phenomenon. Speaking of one-night stand, tracing back to its origins, this word actually originated from abroad and is a borrowed word. The full English name is "One Night Stand". As the name suggests, it refers to a love affair that occurs overnight. But now many people think that the so-called "one-night stand" is actually an inaccurate term. It is better to call it "one-night sex" to be more direct and appropriate. Otherwise, they will ask, how many stands can there be in one night? So what is the situation of one-night stand now? Let us lift its hijab together.

A Life should have a variety of experiences

Mr. He is the owner of a large hotel in Nanjing. He comes from a well-off family and is still young. He is not yet 30. He is a young man who achieves success at an early age and becomes a successful person early. He doesn't want to get married because he doesn't want to be bound by his family; he doesn't have a regular girlfriend because he likes one-night stands.

Because he has money and status, most of his social circle consists of high-level, high-income mainstream people. They have a fixed place to go, which is a high-end bar in Nanjing. They find happiness here and also seek one-night stands. Mr. He usually drinks in the bar while paying attention to the women coming in and out. Since this bar is a high-consumption bar, the level of the girls who come is not low. They are often high-quality and very beautiful girls. If he finds the target, he will usually ask the waiter to bring him a glass of red wine. After the girl receives the red wine, the waiter will usually point at him. When the girl pays attention to him, he will raise the glass to signal. If the girl refuses to accept the red wine at this time, it is usually out of luck, and if she accepts it, it is usually the beginning of a one-night stand. At this time, Mr. He will walk over, say hello politely, then drink and chat, and finally open a room, have sex, and then go their separate ways. Generally, they will not ask each other's name or occupation, because they are just each other. Take what you need.

Mr. He said, I like freshness and excitement. I think a person should have a variety of life experiences. One-night stand is also an experience, so I don’t think there is anything wrong with one-night stand. As for whether to call it a "one-night stand", I think it doesn't matter. The key is to have that feeling, which is enough.

People like Mr. He who seek one-night stands in some entertainment venues are relatively common among the one-night stand group. They usually give a glass of wine, light a cigarette, and put on a good show.

B Looking for a boyfriend through one-night stand

With the rapid development of the information age, the chances of obtaining one-night stands through information are also very high, such as using the Internet and mobile phone text messages. Among them, the Internet provides greater space for one-night stands. Nowadays, many websites have chat rooms with exciting topics for netizens to communicate. Some netizens also post naked online seeking one-night stands. According to a survey by NetEase Guangdong Station, 34.6% of the ways to get to know one-night stands are through the Internet, and 24.4% are through website chat rooms.

Ms. Wang is the design director of a large company in Nanjing. She is very busy at work and has almost no rest days. She is now 27 years old, but she has not had time to talk about a boyfriend. Due to the convenience of work, she spends a lot of time online, so she and netizens communicate more than with real friends. Since she also has needs, she also prefers to try one-night stands.

She usually talks about this topic with some familiar netizens who have the same needs. When both parties have this intention, they will make an appointment to meet. If it feels right, everyone will have dinner together and then book a room. If she feels that the other person is excellent and she would be happy with him afterwards, she will be ready to propose a relationship with him, but so far, she has not found the right one.

Ms. Wang believes that a one-night stand does not require too much commitment and responsibility, so first of all, she is more relaxed. If she can find a suitable partner, that would be the best. If she cannot, it will be okay. She believes that a one-night stand can be called love, because at least both men and women who have a one-night stand can accept each other, so it can be regarded as a bit of love at first sight, and at least there is love on that night.

C The consequences of one-night stand

There are many ways for one-night stands to occur. In addition to the entertainment venues and Internet information mentioned in the above two stories, some parties also provide conditions for one-night stands, such as some single parties, dances, and even some one-night stands are not deliberately sought out, and some occur unintentionally. , we may not be able to list them all here. But what we can find is that most of the people who have one-night stands are high-income, high-quality, and high-consumption people. Maybe their sexual concepts are relatively open, so they are acceptable to one-night stands, but I wonder if they have thought about the consequences of one-night stands when they enjoy the joy that one-night stands bring to them?

First of all, one-night stands have brought about the spread of sexually transmitted diseases and AIDS, which have seriously affected health. If girls are not properly protected, they may also run the risk of pregnancy; secondly, if a married man and woman have one-night stands, it can easily lead to the deterioration of the relationship between husband and wife, or even the breakdown of the marriage; thirdly, Third, multiple sexual partners will reduce sexual sensitivity, and in the face of pressure from all parties, it will also cast a psychological shadow; fourth, it will give criminals an opportunity to take advantage of it. Nowadays, some criminals use this to set up situations and threaten people. occur.

D There are different opinions about one-night stand

Regarding the views on one-night stands, let’s take a look at the opinions of various parties:

Liu Dalin (famous Chinese sexologist): The pursuit of sexual freedom is not absolute and without any restrictions. Human sexuality includes factors of love and morality. If you overindulge your sexual desire and pursue so-called pure sexual satisfaction, people will become decadent and depraved. Sex is instinctive, natural, and more social. Humanity's choice of monogamy is the negation of group marriage and hybridization in the past, and it is the progress of civilization. One-night stands that purely pursue sex have no merit and should be completely rejected. Encouraging one-night stands encourages people to be irresponsible, which is not conducive to social stability. Moreover, from an individual point of view, as a person with a sound personality, he should not adopt a casual attitude towards sex.

Chu Zhaorui (an expert on emotion and sexual psychology at the Jiangsu Academy of Social Sciences): We do not advocate one-night stands because the consequences it brings are very serious. I advise some young people not to blindly try one-night stands for temporary pleasure. For some physiological needs, they should adopt other methods and not just rely on one-night stands to solve them. For those of you who have tried one-night stands, I hope you will just give it a try, don’t indulge in it, and enjoy it endlessly.

Zhang (graduate student): One-night stands have greatly enriched people’s quality of life and given them great imagination.

Ms. Ye (Director of the Agency Office): I think if a married man and woman have a one-night stand, it represents betrayal, irresponsibility to the spouse, great harm to the relationship, and an excuse to indulge oneself.

Mr. Ge (owner of a private enterprise): I don’t mind one-night stands. If someone is confident that he can attract me, he might as well give it a try.

Mr. Ouyang (website editor): A sexologist said: "No one dates these days, everyone just goes to bed!" I think it's quite suitable for a one-night stand.

Ms. Fang (Staff from the Civil Affairs Bureau): There are also incidents of family and marriage breakdown caused by one-night stands. I advise everyone not to lose the big for the small.

Mr. Mo (Disco DJ): I know many examples of one-night stands, but I think this is purely someone else’s private life and others have no right to point fingers at it.

Officer Liu (policeman from the police station): Nowadays, there are many crimes committed through one-night stands. Citizens should be careful not to fall into a trap for quick pleasure.

Dr. Pan (Obstetrician and Gynecologist): Abortions occur frequently due to one-night stands, and there are also many people who contract sexually transmitted diseases due to one-night stands.

E Do you want a one-night stand?

There is currently no authoritative organization in China that has conducted a statistical survey on one-night stands, but one-night stands have become a social phenomenon that does exist and has had a strong impact on the inherent sexual and moral concepts of the Chinese people. Sina, my country's famous portal website, has an online survey, the content is "Urban Ye Weiyang, she (he) looks very good...will you have a one-night stand?" In the survey, 70% of people thought that it would, Among them, men accounted for 57% and women accounted for 13%. By the time the reporter finished writing, nearly 150,000 people had participated in the vote. It can be seen that although there are still many people who know the dangers of one-night stands, they still long for one-night stands in their hearts. But what cannot be ignored is that although one-night stand is considered a very romantic thing, although it does not require responsibility, it can bring physical joy to both men and women, and can relieve the pressure and mental tension in life. But the various negative consequences it brings at the same time cannot be ignored.

Urban men and women, do you want a one-night stand? The reporter reminds you to think twice before you act.