Women are most afraid of going to bed. Even if something big happens, even if she hates you to the point of itch, as long as you sleep, the dark clouds in the sky will dissipate. However, after sleeping together, do they need to mention the disagreement between the two again? I imagine this is not uncommon. As the saying goes: It rains from the sky and flows from the ground to the ground. There is no need for a young couple to worry about quarrels. They have a bowl to eat and a pillow to sleep on. It seems that sleeping and having sex is indeed the best way to calm down marital disputes.

The two most popular views on sex

One view of sex is dominated by women, who can be said to be emotional supremacists. They overemphasize the emotional component of sexual contact. They must first be overflowing with emotion, and then allow for unrestrained sensuality. In other words, before the relationship reaches a high degree of harmony, they regard sexual union as an incredible thing, which can even be compared with rape.

Another view of sex is more common among men. They can be said to be carnal omniists. They believe too much in the power of sensuality and regard sex as a kind of conquest deep in their hearts. They believe that as long as they conquer a woman physically, then the spiritual conquest is self-evident.

Regarding these two views, most sex experts praise the former and belittle the latter. But in my opinion, the guiding significance of these two views on people's sexual life cannot be doubted. Let’s talk about the former first, that is, the emotional supremacist. When two people are in love, this understanding will undoubtedly bring rich and colorful spiritual connotations to sexual life. And once there is a crack in the relationship between two people, even if there is a slight discomfort due to a little friction, the first thing to be sacrificed is sexual contact. The greater tragedy of this kind of people is that they have no idea what is wrong with them. They are deeply influenced by traditional concepts and regard the spirit as noble and the flesh as despicable. They would never allow themselves to be driven by their fleshly desires, considering it shameful to do so. Even if sometimes one's own sexual requirements are very strong, they must be suppressed by force.

Let’s talk about the latter. Lust is by no means omnipotent, but conversely it cannot be said that lust is incompetent. The popular saying that Sister Huang just mentioned is that couples don't have to worry about fighting. A small pillow at night vividly describes the process of successful sexual mediation between couples. When there is a barrier in spiritual communication, let the flesh take the lead. Use close physical contact to dilute the unhappiness in your heart, create a harmonious environment and atmosphere, and then eliminate the previous unhappiness on this basis. Even difficult things will be solved easily.

So conflicts between husband and wife are not difficult to resolve?

Yes. Based on the above analysis, we can calmly answer the questions raised by the couple. For that wife, we should tell her this: You should not refuse your husband’s sexual request, especially after the two have a conflict. Spirit and body can have priorities, but they should not be distinguished. You can put spiritual communication first, or you can put physical communication first. A wife must not think that her husband's lack of words and emphasis on actions means that he only cares about himself. We must know that action is a silent language, and wives must seriously appreciate the goodwill expressed by their husbands through making love.

For that man, we should tell him this: Using sex to seek relationship improvement may not be a bad way, but it must not be regarded as a universal magic weapon. The pleasure brought by sexual contact can trigger beautiful feelings between both parties, but it does not mean that the original cause of the conflict does not exist. Husbands need to know that it is best to strike while the iron is hot to completely resolve this conflict. If you are at fault, you must admit it as soon as possible. If you admit your mistake at this time, your wife will be happy to express her understanding. If you treat sexual contact as a cure-all for all ailments and keep doing the same thing again and again, it won't be long before your wife stops doing this and becomes completely disgusted with you.

A wife should not refuse her husband's sexual request, especially after the two have a conflict. Spirit and body can have priorities, but they should not be distinguished. You can put spiritual communication first, or you can put physical communication first. A wife must not think that her husband's lack of words and emphasis on actions means that he only cares about himself. We must know that action is a silent language, and wives must seriously appreciate the goodwill expressed by their husbands through making love.

We tell our husbands this way: Using sex to seek improvement in relationships may not be a bad idea, but it must not be regarded as a universal magic weapon. The pleasure brought by sexual contact can trigger beautiful feelings between both parties, but it does not mean that the original cause of the conflict does not exist. Husbands need to know that it is best to strike while the iron is hot to completely resolve this conflict. If you are at fault, you must admit it as soon as possible. If you admit your mistake at this time, your wife will be happy to express her understanding. If you treat sexual contact as a cure-all for all ailments and keep doing the same thing again and again, it won't be long before your wife stops doing this and becomes completely disgusted with you. By that time, it will be too late to fix some things.

Couples who communicate regularly will be more sexually happy

Communication between husband and wife about sexual life is very important, but it is not easy and sometimes very difficult. Perhaps some couples spend their entire lives together and never truly understand and communicate with each other about their sexual life.

Selfish

After ten years of marriage, Mr. C and Ms. D lost interest in sex. Through psychological counseling, it was discovered that the problem was a lack of mutual praise and support. During the consultation, Mr. C complained that Ms. D took everything he did for granted, and Ms. D admitted this. But he also never complimented her or paid attention to her, she said. A man not getting compliments is just as terrible as a woman not getting compliments, both leaving them emotionally deficient. After consultation, Mr. C and Ms. D realized the importance of mutual praise and enthusiasm.

Frustrated

Mr. A and Ms. B have only been married for five years, but their sex life is already quite boring. Ms. B is no longer interested in having sex, and Mr. A is in a bad mood because of rejection. They often have quarrels over this. The reason is mainly due to Ms. B's depression. Half a year ago, Ms. B’s mother passed away. She was very sad and depressed.

Mr. A did not understand that his wife's depression would last for six months and she would lose interest in sex. In fact, everyone will become depressed when they encounter emotional injuries, financial problems, work setbacks, or are under extreme pressure.

Sex Myths

Although sexual myths and sexual taboos are two extremes, they can also damage people's sexual relationships. Mr. G and his wife are an example. Mr. G has some bachelor friends who often brag about their sexual adventures. Mr. G also saw performances of introductory sexual skills in some TV videos. He gradually felt that he was missing something, thinking that his relationship with his wife was not as wonderful as other people's.

Sexual taboos

Mr. E and Ms. F have been married for four years, and Mr. E's impotence has become increasingly serious. Mr. e is in a painful situation due to sexual taboos. He feels that "good girls" should not have anything to do with sex. Because he thinks his wife is a "good girl," he always feels nervous and blames himself when having sex with his wife, and eventually becomes unwilling to have sex with her.

Communication is the key to a good sexual relationship

Both couples must try to understand the other person, and communication is the key to a good sexual relationship. Pursuing the renewal of a couple's sexual life and pursuing the improvement of the activeness of a couple's sexual life is by no means a once-in-a-while task, but a sweet and happy "sexual path" that requires the couple to persevere throughout their lives and walk hand in hand.