There is a 3-year age difference between men and women who are most likely to have affairs

A survey in Singapore showed that problems are most likely to occur when the average age of husbands is 40 years old and the average age of wives is 37 years old, and the divorce rate is also quite high. After more than ten years of living together, the running-in period has long passed. Why can't we escape the marital crisis? We can discuss that today.

The accumulation of trivial matters in life turns into resentment

Professor Zhu Rongshen, a sexual psychology expert, said: "In the age group of 40 for men and 37 for women, it is very common for couples to appear in harmony but be separated from each other."

A survey shows that 20% of the total number of divorces end up divorced due to poor communication between husband and wife on trivial matters. The problem of daily necessities accumulated over many years of marriage has become the most hurtful weapon.

The first 3 years of marriage are the running-in period, the 7th year is the dangerous period, and 10 years later is the burnout period. The marriage age of 40-year-old men and 37-year-old women is generally about 10 years. In the first two or three years, everyone is in the running-in period and is still tolerant.

When we were six or seven years old, we all knew it was dangerous, so we were cautious; after ten years, everyone felt that the other person was like their right-hand man, and thought that family affection had replaced love, so they would take things that were not a problem before. We went out to make a scene, and there were too many small quarrels, which were very hurtful.

In addition, after being married for 10 years, the couple has become very different in appearance and behavior from when they got married. Their personalities, outlook on life, outlook on money, attitude towards educating children, Differences in everything from how you handle stress will be exposed during this period, and any one of these issues can be enough to paralyze a marriage.

Professor Zhu said: "The longer the marriage lasts and the more accustomed we are to each other, the easier it is to ignore the importance of mutual understanding, and the relationship gradually becomes indifferent." Professor Zhu believes that no matter what problems there are, Both spouses should communicate openly and avoidance of problems is not the answer.

External temptations lead to infidelity

After 10 years of ups and downs in a marriage, the passion gradually fades. If the mentality of both parties to the marriage is not adjusted in time, it may create opportunities for the emergence of an affair.

40-year-old men have overcome the naivety and fanaticism of young people, have the talents and experience of middle-aged people, and have the wisdom to assess the situation. On the one hand, these mature performances allow them to continue to stand out in their careers. , attracting the admiration of young people of the opposite sex.

On the other hand, it will make them increasingly unable to be satisfied with their original stable marital status and hope to seek new changes. If the wife does not adjust her state in time at this time, the middle-aged man will be attracted to the young women around him and have an affair. Many of them will even ask their wives for divorce.

After the passion subsides, there are two types of behaviors for women in their thirties and forties. One type of people, like men, are not satisfied with the status quo. Most of them will seek comfort from their colleagues and friends, and some will develop to the point of divorce. The other type will consider many factors, either trying to save their marriage, or silently enduring a depressed life without emotion.

The "seven-year itch" is a borrowed term, which means that many things will develop into problems in the seventh year regardless of human will, and marriage is certainly no exception.

After being married for a long time, the novelty is lost. From a romantic love to a real marriage, in the ordinary day and night together, we are so familiar with each other, and the shortcomings that were concealed during love or the differences in concepts between the two parties have been fully exposed at this time. Therefore, emotional "exhaustion" or boredom causes the marriage to enter a "bottleneck". If no effective method can be chosen to pass this "bottleneck", the marriage will end.

Some people jump into the siege in confusion when they are still very young, but when it comes to marriage, how many men and women in their twenties are calm and rational?

That’s true.

Not to mention people in their twenties, even in their thirties and forties, I am afraid that not many people have a complete and mature understanding of marriage.

In this sense, there are not a few people who enter marriage in a daze.

Men should be married when they are older, and women should be married when they are older. Many people separate from their parents when they reach adulthood and feel that they should have their own family, so they make friends, go on blind dates, and enter into marriage happily or passively.

In modern times, it is advocated to fall in love first and then get married. In the past, most people got married first and then fell in love. However, men and women who are in love may not necessarily be able to carry their love to the end after they get married. Many lovers soon get tired of it after marriage.

In many loveless marriages, the existence of children is an important reason, but children should not be the only reason for maintaining a marriage. However, since you choose not to give up, you should maintain it well. If, as Guo says, you only have one life, and for married people, marriage is an important part of life, why not make a little effort to make it happier!